DL Hughley - University Study

DL Hughley: Shocked and Appalled Season 1, Ep 101 05/15/2005 Views: 13,420

DL Hughley has discovered a scientific study that links women's health to regular oral sex. (4:21)

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WOMEN LOVE TO TALK AND THEY LOVEMONEY AND MEN LOVE SEX.

THAT'S THE DEAL.

YOU COULD THINK AND YOU HAVE ITSO WE HAVE TO TOLERATE YOUR

BULL [BLEEP].

YOU COULD THINK WE PUT UP WITHALL YOUR STUFF 'CAUSE OF YOUR

SPARKLING ASS PERSONALITIESBUT YOU'D BE WRONG.

[LAUGHTER]THE BEST SEX YOU EVER GET IS

BEFORE YOU GET MARRIED 'CAUSETHEY AUDITIONING FOR THE JOB.

[LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE]

DON'T LOOK AT ME LIKE THAT.

EVERYBODY IN HERE DONE BEEN ONONE OF THEM JOB INTERVIEWS.

[LAUGHTER]SO YOU WANT THE JOB BAD ENOUGH

SO YOU LIE TO GET IT.

"WILL YOU WORK ON SATURDAYS?""YEAH, YEAH, YEAH, I'LL WORK ON

SATURDAYS."

[LAUGHTER]"ARE YOU A TEAM PLAYER?"

"YUP.

I'M A TEAM PLAYER."

[LAUGHTER CONTINUES]I JUST READ SOMETHING ON THE

INTERNET SO YOU KNOW IT'S TRUE.

[LAUGHTER]AND I WANT YOU TO LISTEN

VERY CAREFULLY.

I JUST READ THAT A UNIVERSITYDID A FIVE-YEAR STUDY THAT

CONCLUDED THAT WOMEN WHO PERFORMFELATIO AT LEAST TWO TIMES

A WEEK AND [BLEEP] THE SEMENLOWER THEIR RISK OF

BREAST CANCER BY AS MUCH AS 50%.

[LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE]OH.

HOLD ON.

I'M NOT LYING.

[LAUGHTER & APPLAUSE CONTINUES]

AN ACTUAL UNIVERSITY STUDY.

NOW I HAVE A GED, BUT THIS WORDFELATIO SOUNDED INTERESTING

TO ME SO I LOOKED IT UP.

AND LET ME TELL YOU LEARNINGCAN BE FUN.

AND IT SAYS, "STUDY FINDS THATFELATIO MAY SIGNIFICANTLY

DECREASE THE RISK OFBREAST CANCER IN WOMEN."

AND I WILL POINT TO A SPECIFICQUOTE.

[LAUGHTER]"DR. MARY SMITH WHO SAYS,

'ONLY WITH REGULAR OCCURRENCEWILL YOUR CHANCES BE REDUCED.

SO...

[LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE]I ENCOURAGE ALL WOMEN OUT THERE

TO MAKE FELATIO AN IMPORTANTPART OF THEIR DAILY ROUTINE.'

SAID DR. MARY SMITH ONE OF THERESEARCHERS AT THE UNIVERSITY,

'SINCE THE EMERGENCE OF THERESEARCH I TRY TO FELATIATE AT

LEAST ONCE EVERY NIGHT TO REDUCEMY CHANCES.'"

SEE, SEE, ALL THIS TIME YOUTHOUGHT WE WERE BEING NASTY

WE WERE ONLY TRYING TO SAVE YOURLIFE.

[LAUGHTER, CHEERS & APPLAUSE]

AND THIS IS SCIENCE.

CAN'T ARGUE WITH SCIENCE.

IT ALSO POINTS OUT THAT FELATIOHAS SEVERAL OTHER MEDICINAL

BENEFITS.

"IT CAN SHORTEN THE LENGTH ANDSEVERITY OF A COLD OR FLU.

[LAUGHTER]CAN SOOTH A SORE THROAT.

AND CAN HELP MANAGE DEPRESSION."

[LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE]THEY SHOULD HAVE NEVER TOLD ME

NO [BLEEP] LIKE THIS.

[LAUGHTER & APPLAUSE CONTINUES]"HONEY, GET IN HERE, IT'S TIME

FOR YOUR MEDICATION."

WOMEN--WOMEN ARE GOING TO BE SCARED

TO COUGH.

[COUGH][COUGH]

"HEY GIRL, YOU COUGHING?"[LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE]

"I JUST--I WANT YOU TO KNOW THAT I'M HERE

FOR YOU."

"LEAVE ME ALONE, MY THROATIS SORE."

♪ RICOLA