Jim Gaffigan - The Youngest Child

  • Season 3 , Ep 6
  • 07/11/2000
  • Views: 37,074

The youngest child has to deal with all the problems caused by the older children. (1:36)

NINE PARENTS.

ANYONE ELSE--

I'M ACTUALLY ONE OF SIX KIDS,CATHOLIC.

YOU EVER NOTICE PEOPLEFROM BIG CATHOLIC FAMILIES--

THEY ALWAYS THROW THAT"CATHOLIC" AFTER THE NUMBER.

"SIX KIDS, CATHOLIC.SIX KIDS, CATHOLIC."

LIKE, IF YOU DIDN'T HEARTHE CATHOLIC PART, YOU THINK,

"SIX KIDS--HIS MOTHER REALLY LIKES SEX.

OH, SHE WAS CATHOLIC.OKAY."

I'M THE YOUNGEST TOO.

AND WHEN YOU'RE THE YOUNGESTOF A BIG FAMILY,

PEOPLE ARE ALWAYS LIKE,

"YOU'RE THE BABY.YOU'RE SPOILED."

WHEN YOU'RE THE YOUNGESTOF A BIG FAMILY,

BY THE TIME YOU'RE A TEENAGER,YOUR PARENTS ARE INSANE.

YOU'RE LIKE,"HEY, I'M GOING ROLLERSKATING."

"YOU'RE NOT GOING ROLLERSKATING.

"YOU'LL END UP PREGNANTLIKE YOUR SISTER.

WHY DON'T YOU SMOKE POTAND BECOME A LAWYER?"

PARENTS GET BURNED OUTIN BIG FAMILIES.

YOU COULD EVEN SEE ITIN THE NAMING OF CHILDREN.

IT'S ALWAYS LIKE THE FIRST KID,"YOU WERE NAMED AFTER GRANDMA."

THE SEVENTH KID,

"YOU WERE NAMEDAFTER A SANDWICH I HAD.

"I LOVE THAT.

NOW, GET YOUR BROTHER REUBEN."

[laughter]

ANYBODY A GYM TEACHER HERE?

YOU THINK WHEN GYM TEACHERSARE YOUNGER THEY'RE THINKING,

"I WANT TO TEACH,BUT I DON'T WANT TO READ.

HOW ABOUT KICKBALLFOR 40 YEARS?"

I CAN'T BELIEVEWE GOT GRADES IN GYM CLASS.

I'VE NEVER USED ANYTHINGI LEARNED IN THERE.

I'VE NEVER BEEN,

"I'M STANDING IN FRONT OFA ROOM FULL OF STRANGERS--

"BASED ON WHATI'VE LEARNED IN GYM CLASS,

"I WILL THROW A RED BALLAT A FAT GUY.

THAT'S NO GOOD."

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