Ardal O'Hanlon - Irish People

  • Season 5 , Ep 15
  • 10/07/2001
  • Views: 4,500

Irish people have spread themselves all over the world. (2:01)

HUH?

AND LOOK AT THE SIZE OF THIS

PLACE!

HUH?

THIS STAGE IS FAR TOO BIG

FOR MY PURPOSES!

HUH?

I WON'T BE GOING OVER THERE

AT ALL!

(LAUGHTER)

SO, I'M FROM IRELAND.

(CHEERS AND APPLAUSE)

HOORAY!

HOORAY!

IT'S FANTASTIC!

YOU'RE ALL IRISH!

HOORAY!

AND I'M TYPICALLY IRISH, REALLY,

IN THE SENSE THAT I DON'T LIVE

THERE ANYMORE.

YOU KNOW, WHEREVER YOU GO

IN THE WORLD, YOU'RE ALWAYS

GOING TO RUN INTO A BIG CROWD

OF IRISH PEOPLE.

ALL OVER NEW YORK AND

THE UNITED STATES,

ALL OVER EUROPE.

I GUARANTEE IT IF YOU GO DEEP

INTO THE HEART OF OF THE AMAZON

JUNGLE, YOU WILL STUMBLE ON A

TRIBE OF PREVIOUSLY UNDISCOVERED

IRISH PEOPLE!

WITH STICKS AND TIN WHISTLES,

AND BIG HAIRY EARS!

WHOSE ONLY WORDS ARE-- ARGH!

GO ON AND HAVE A DRINK!

YOU'LL HAVE ONE!

HUH?

COME ON, YOU'LL HAVE A DRINK!

COME ON!

HUH?!

(AUDIENCE CHEERS)

NOW, THE BIG DIFFERENCE BETWEEN

IRISH PEOPLE AND AMERICAN PEOPLE

IS THAT WE DON'T LIKE TO

COMPLAIN,AND YOU'RE VERY GOOD

AT IT.

IN RESTAURANTS, YOU KNOW,

IF YOU DON'T LIKE THE FOOD,

JUST SEND IT BACK.

IF YOU DON'T LIKE THE CURTAINS,

YOU BURN THEM.

YEAH?

IN IRELAND, WE ACCEPT WHAT WE'RE

GIVEN.

IF YOU'VE GOT HAIR, AND YOU GO

TO A BARBER'S, AND YOU GET YOUR

HAIR CUT, AND THE BARBER MAKES

A COMPLETE MESS OF IT, AND SAYS,

"HOW DOES THAT FEEL?"

YOU ALWAYS GO--

AH, THAT'S GRAND.

THANKS VERY MUCH.

I FEEL LIKE A KING, THANK YOU.

YOU'RE A GENIUS WITH THOSE

SCISSORS!

AND LIKEWISE, I WAS ON THE

PLANE, ON MY WAY TO NEW YORK.

AND THE STEWARDESS COME OVER

TO ME AND SHE SAID, WHERE ARE

YOU FROM?

AND I SAID I WAS IRISH,

'CAUSE IT'S TRUE, AND DIDN'T

WANT TO MESS HER AROUND.

YOU KNOW?

NOT AT THAT ALTITUDE.

AND SHE SAID TO ME,

SO YOU'RE IRISH, ARE YA?

YOU'LL BE NEEDING THIS SO...

AND SHE LEFT THE DRINKS TROLLEY

THERE BESIDE ME.

(CHEERS AND APPL

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