now out here in New York.
Not to worry, though,because I just
got a new home security system.
And so, you know, it's one ofthose ones where after I unlock
the door, I have 30 secondsto disarm the system or else
a really loud alarm goes off.
And this protects me but allfrom all but the deaf burglar.
Anyway, I wanted one thatwould like spray the place
with bullets, but then I, then Irealized that it would not only
kill the intruder, butdestroy the possessions
I was trying to protect.
And so then I thought,well, maybe poison gas,
but then I figured, well, whatif I set it off by accident,
which is fairly likely,since I like to,
when I come home, I like to makeit exciting by pretending I'm
James Bond and, you know, ifI don't turn it off in time,
it'll launch a nuclearattack against Russia.
And so, sometimesI drop my keys,
you know, to make alittle more exciting.
[humming james bond theme]
So I, actually, if youdon't turn it off in time,
it calls the police.
Well, first a companycalls me or calls the house
to make sure it's notme just pretending
I'm James Bond, uh, actually.
And I have to tell them thepassword-- there's a password.
Otherwise, a burglar wouldjust answer the phone,
yes, hello, well, ofcourse, it's Jake.
If I wasn't Jake, would Ibe answering Jake's phone?
Now turn off this alarm soI can enjoy my belongings.
But he can't do that, becauseI've made up of password.
Actually, I didn'tmake-- I mean,
I chose it from allthe possible words.
Probably, I should have usedone of my made-up words,
That way he couldn't knowwhat it was, you know.
I would, only me would know.
What do you meanwhat does it mean?
It means "gablurngle."
Now, turn it off, youidiot, it's gablurngling me.
That's what gablurngle means.