Todd Lynn - Interacting at Night

  • Season 9 , Ep 14
  • 05/12/2005
  • Views: 4,458

White people aren't afraid of black people during the day. (1:32)

YOU KNOW WHAT'S FUNNY TOO,

I ALWAYS LIKED PERFORMING IN

FRONT OF CROWDS BECAUSE NOBODY

EVER BELIEVES I'M A COMEDIAN.

SOON AS I WALK ON STAGE THEY'RE

LIKE, "WHY IS THE DOORMAN DOING

COMEDY?"

[LAUGHTER]

I SEEN THE WAY Y'ALL LOOKED AT

ME.

AND DON'T GET ME WRONG,

I UNDERSTAND WHAT I LOOK LIKE.

I'M A BIG BLACK KIND OF EVIL

LOOKING DUDE.

I MEAN, I KNOW WHAT I LOOK LIKE.

I LOOK LIKE EVERY COMPOSITE

DRAWING YOU EVER SEEN ON

AMERICA'S MOST WANTED.

NO, NO, LET ME GIVE YOU ALL

VISUAL FROM THE NECK UP.

LOOK.

[LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE]

Y'ALL DON'T KNOW HOW DIFFICULT--

DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR

ME NO TO SCARE WHITE PEOPLE?

DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA?

THE STUFF I HAVE TO DO

EVERY DAY?

I MEAN-- AND IT'S FUNNY BECAUSE

WHITE PEOPLE HAVE SELECTIVE FEAR

WHEN IT COMES TO ME.

IT'S NOT LIKE-- 'CAUSE THEY'RE

NOT AFRAID OF ME IN THE DAYTIME.

IT'S ALWAYS AT NIGHT.

IN THE DAYTIME I'M LIKE A

CIRCUS ATTRACTION.

THEY LOOKING AT ME GOING,

"HEY LOOK, IT'S A BIG BLACK GUY.

LET'S GIVE HIM A HOT DOG SEE

WHAT HE DOES.

HUH."

BUT AT NIGHT IT'S A TOTALLY

DIFFERENT STORY.

OKAY?

I WALK UP BEHIND THEM, THEY

ZIGZAGGING ACROSS THE STREET.

THEY GOT THEIR MACE OUT AND

THEIR KUBITAHN KARATE THING.

JABBING IT AT ME LIKE,

"RELEASE, GET BACK, ATTACK."

I'M LIKE, "AHH!"

WHAT DO Y'ALL THINK BLACK

PEOPLE--

WHAT DO YOU ALL THINK WE GOT

LIKE SOME KIND OF NOCTURNAL

SUPER POWER OR SOMETHING WHERE

WE TELEPORT IN AND OUT OF THE

SHADOWS SNATCHING YOUR BAGS

LIKE, "GIVE ME YOUR BAGS.

I'M NIGHTTIME [BLEEP] MAN.

[LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE]

KNEEL BEFORE MY DARK ARCANE

[BLEEP] POWERS.

ARGH ARGH!"

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