Sweet Emoji - I Fell in Love with a Terrorist at Sizzler

  • Season 1 , Ep 01025
  • 02/19/2014
  • Views: 875

Matt Besser, Matt Walsh and Ian Roberts turn seemingly harmless strings of emoji into full -- and occasionally bizarre -- sentences. (3:11)

TO PLAY SWEET EMOJI.

(CHEERS AND APPLAUSE)

EMOJI ARE PICTURES THAT PEOPLE

USE WHEN THEY SEND TEXTS IN

ORDER TO AVOID USING ACTUAL

WORDS BECAUSE WORDS ARE SO LAST

CENTURY, YOU GUYS.

PICTURES OF ANIMALS AND

VEGETABLES ARE GREAT FOR TEXTS.

I'M GOING TO SHOW YOU GUYS A

SERIES OF THREE EMOJI AND FOR

250 POINTS I WANT YOU TO

TRANSLATE THEM INTO A SENTENCE.

ALL RIGHT?

THIS ONE STARTS WITH A

CAMCORDER.

TRANSLATE THAT INTO A SENTENCE.

YES, WALSH.

>> I FILMED YOU GIVING A SHOCKER

TO MY CAT.

(LAUGHTER)

(CHEERS AND APPLAUSE)

THAT'S ACTUALLY TRUE.

>> Chris: I DON'T SEE HOW IT

COULD BE ANYTHING ELSE.

>> IT'S TRUE.

>> Chris: I REALLY DON'T SEE

HOW IT COULD BE ANYTHING ELSE.

>> UNFORTUNATELY, I READ THAT AS

I ELECTROCUTED MY WIFE'S

(BLEEP).

WHILE MAKING A SEX TAPE.

>> THAT'S GOOD, TOO, BUT THAT'S

NOT WHAT IT MEANT.

>> THEY TOLD US NOT TO BRING UP

REAL STUFF, THOUGH.

(LAUGHTER)

>> OH, IS THAT YOUR TEXT?

>> CAN YOU EDIT THAT OUT?

>> Chris: YEAH, I'M SURE WE CAN

TAKE THAT RIGHT OUT.

>> HIS WIFE IS NOT GOING TO WANT

TO HEAR THAT.

>> Chris: YEAH. YES.

>> HI, KATY.

(CHEERS AND APPLAUSE)

>> Chris: SO IF WE'RE GOING TO

EDIT THAT OUT, I SHOULDN'T GIVE

ANY POINTS.

ALL RIGHT, NEXT ONE, NEXT ONE.

THIS HAS A RAINY UMBRELLA IN IT.

YES, BESSER.

>> I GOT SOME WET PUSSY ACTION.

(LAUGHTER)

>> Chris: OH, MY GOD!

YES!

OF COURSE!

(CHEERS AND APPLAUSE)

STOP BUTT-SLAPPING MY AUDIENCE.

(CHEERS AND APPLAUSE)

>> OR CASTING ANGRY WET PUSSY

FOR INDEPENDENT FILM.

(LAUGHTER)

>> WHERE'S THE INDEPENDENT ICON

IN THERE?

>> BECAUSE A REAL FILMMAKER

WOULD HAVE HAD STUFF WRITTEN ON

THE THING.

>> OR LITERALLY INDEPENDENT.

>> Chris: AND THAT FILM WAS

CALLED "BUFFALO 66."

(LAUGHTER)

ALL RIGHT, THIS ONE'S GOT A FIRE

AND A TELESCOPE IN IT.

THIS ONE'S GOT-- YES, MATT

WALSH.

>> UPON CLOSER INSPECTION,

LESBIANS STARTED THE FIRE.

(LAUGHTER)

(CHEERS AND APPLAUSE)

>> Chris: POINTS FOR SURE!

POINTS!

>> WANT TO SEE ME SET MY TWINS

ON FIRE?

(LAUGHTER)

>> Chris: POINTS!

POINTS.

ALL RIGHT, NEXT ONE.

THIS ONE HAS GOT SOME DELICIOUS

FRIED SHRIMP IN IT.

BESSER.

>> I BOMBED DOING COMEDY FOR A

MIDGET.

(LAUGHTER)

>> I NEED THAT EXPLAINED.

WHERE'S THE MIDGET?

>> IT'S SHRIMP!

>> OH, SHRIMP.

>> Chris: YES, WE ALL GOT THE

DEROGATORY SLUR.

NO, BESSER, PLEASE!

>> SORRY, SOMETIMES MY JOKES

MAKE ME FALL DOWN.

(LAUGHTER)

>> I FELL IN LOVE WITH A

TERRORIST AT SIZZLER.

(LAUGHTER)

>> Chris: YES, POINTS.

I'LL GIVE YOU POINTS FOR THAT.

IAN?

>> TERRORISTS LOVE SHRIMP.

>> Chris: THEY DO, THEY LOVE

SHRIMP.

>> IF THEY DON'T, WE WIN.

(LAUGHTER)

>> Chris: OKAY, THIS ONE ENDS

WITH LIPSTICK.

THIS ONE ENDS WITH LIPSTICK.

IAN.

>> I'M REALLY A DUDE.

(LAUGHTER)

>> Chris: POINTS, IAN.

POINTS.

(CHEERS AND APPLAUSE)

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