Mike Sweeney - Irish Persecution

Paul Mooney & Mike Sweeney Season 1, Ep 0156 02/24/1992 Views: 1,332

No one has had it worse than the Irish. (1:59)

HOW ABOUT I HEAR ITFOR THIS SET?

HOLY COW, IT'S ROCOCO...TO THE EXTREME.

I DARE YOU TO FINDTHE FIRE EXTINGUISHER.

WELL, LET ME TALKABOUT SOMETHING.

YOU KNOW, WE ALL KNOW...

WE ALL KNOW THAT THERE'S BEENA LOT OF OPPRESSION IN AMERICA.

YOU KNOW, BLACKS HAVE HAD

HORRIBLE,HORRIBLE EXPERIENCES...

JEWS, A LOT OF MINORITY GROUPS.

BUT LET ME TELL YOU, NO ONEHAS HAD IT WORSE THAN THE IRISH.

THAT'S RIGHT, NO.

CAN I GET THIS OUT, PLEASE?

THEY WERE PERSECUTED ATTHE TURN OF THE CENTURY

BY THE U.S. GOVERNMENT.

THAT'S RIGHT, PROHIBITION.

( laughter )

AND YOU KNOW,IT'S STILL NOT ENDING.

HOW DO YOU THINK IRISH PEOPLEFEEL-- IRISH AMERICANS--

WHEN YOU HAVE A VICE-PRESIDENT

WHO CAN'T EVEN SPELLTHE WORD "POTATO"?

( laughter and applause )

IT'S OUTRAGEOUS.

OH, GOD, I LIVE IN NEW YORK CITY

AND I MEET PEOPLEFROM ALL OVER THE WORLD

AND YOU KNOW WHO'LL NEVER ADMITWHAT COUNTRY THEY'RE FROM?

PEOPLE FROM IRAN.

I GUESS THEY ASSUMEWE STILL HATE THEM

WHICH, YOU KNOW,I DON'T THINK WE DO

BUT THEY'RE VERY PARANOID.

THEY ALWAYS SAYTHEY'RE FROM PERSIA.

"OH, YOU'RE FROM PERSIA?

"OH, HOW DO YOU DO?

"I'M FROM THE BYZANTINEEMPIRE, MYSELF.

"OH, MY FRIENDS HERE

"THEY'RE FROM THE LOSTCONTINENT OF ATLANTIS.

"JUST TO MAKE YOU FEEL AT HOME.

"AND I THINK YOU REMEMBER

"MY GOOD FRIENDS THE HITTITESOVER HERE.

ALWAYS NICE WHEN THEY DROP BY."

IT'S UNBELIEVABLE.

SOMEONE ASKED ME TO GODOWN TO MEXICO

BUT I'M A LITTLE NERVOUSAFTER WHAT HAPPENED RECENTLY.

A SEWER PIPE EXPLODEDAND KILLED 200 PEOPLE.

THAT'S WHAT HAPPENS

WHEN YOU HAVE AN ENTIRE COUNTRYEATING MEXICAN FOOD.

( laughter )

I'M AS SHOCKED AS YOU ARE.

I CAN'T EVEN TAKETELEVISION ANYMORE.