eBay Price Is Right - Rusty Metal Things

  • Season 1 , Ep 01024
  • 02/18/2014
  • Views: 1,260

Natasha Leggero, Tom Lennon and Brett Gelman guess the prices of eBay items in this parody of the classic game show. (5:48)

COMEDIANS, IT IS TIME TO PLAY

YOUR FAVORITE EBAY-BASED GAME

SHOW PARODY, EBAY PRICE IS

RIGHT!

COMEDIANS, COME ON DOWN.

OH, GOOD, YOU'RE ALREADY HERE.

WE ARE GOING TO SHOW...

(LAUGHTER)

WE'RE GOING TO SHOW YOU A

SELECTION OF FANTASTIC ITEMS

FROM POPULAR ONLINE AUCTION SITE

EBAY, AND THE COMEDIAN WHO COMES

CLOSEST TO THE ACTUAL EBAY BUY

IT NOW PRICE WITHOUT GOING OVER

WILL WIN A BRAND-NEW POINTS!

(CHEERS AND APPLAUSE)

BY THE WAY, IF YOU BID

A DOLLAR YOU'RE A (BLEEP)

COWARD.

LET'S LIVE A LITTLE.

WAIT, I'M SORRY.

I JUST LIKE THE CHARACTER

YOU'RE DOING.

WHAT IS YOUR NAME?

WHERE ARE YOU FROM?

>> GREG.

>> Chris: GREG, WHERE ARE YOU

FROM, GREG?

>> SPACE.

>> Chris: ALL RIGHT, LET'S

BEGIN.

WE'RE GOING TO GET STARTED WITH

AN INFLATIBLE UNICORN HORN FOR

CATS.

YOUR CAT MAKES A SHOW OF BEING

REGAL AND IN CONTROL, BUT YOU

CAN TURN THAT ALL AROUND WITH

THIS INFLATABLE UNICORN HORN FOR

CATS.

OKAY, ON THE BOX THE CAT SEEMS

INTRIGUED, BUT...

TOM LENNON, HOW MUCH IS THE BUY

IT NOW PRICE?

(AUDIENCE YELLING SUGGESTIONS)

>> OKAY.

SEVEN DOLLARS.

>> Chris: ALL RIGHT, SEVEN

DOLLARS.

SEVEN DOLLARS IS THE BID BY TOM

LENNON.

THE CROWD MADDER AT YOU THAN

THAT CAT IS THAT THAT HORN IS ON

HIS HEAD.

NATASHA LEGGERO, I'D COME

CLOSER, BUT I DON'T HAVE ENOUGH

CABLE.

QUIET!

IT LOOKS LIKE IT DOUBLES AS A

DILDO FOR THE LONELY CAT WOMAN.

I'M GOING TO... $14.99.

>> Chris: $14.99 IS THE BUY IT

NOW PRICE.

BRETT, I'M GOING TO HAVE TO ASK

YOU TO LEAN IN CLOSER TO THIS

MICROPHONE.

>> YES.

I'M GOING TO SAY $10,000.

EMPTY THE BANK ACCOUNT, EMPTY

THE BANK ACCOUNT.

>> Chris: $10,000.

ALL RIGHT.

SEVEN DOLLARS FROM TOM, $14.99

FROM NATASHA, $10,000 FROM

BRETT.

ACTUAL BUY IT NOW PRICE

OF INFLATABLE UNICORN HORN FOR

CATS IS $5.95!

EVERYONE WENT OVER, BUT TOM WAS

CLOSEST.

I'VE GOT TO SAY, THE RULES WERE

WITHOUT GOING OVER, SO NO POINTS

FOR ANYBODY.

THAT'S HOW THAT (BLEEP) WORKS.

>> I REALLY THOUGHT IT WAS

$10,000.

>> Chris: ALL RIGHT.

OUR NEXT ITEM IS RUSTY METAL

THINGS.

THE SELLER SAYS, "I DON'T

RECOMMEND HANDLING THEM TOO

MUCH, AND I'M NOT RESPONSIBLE IF

YOUR DUMB ASS CUTS OPEN YOUR

HAND AND RUBS IT ALL OVER THE

THINGS."

RUSTY METAL THINGS.

TOM LENNON, HOW MUCH FOR BUY IT

NOW?

(AUDIENCE YELLING SUGGESTIONS)

THEY'RE REALLY TRYING.

>> THESE RUSTY METAL THINGS WERE

THE INSPIRATION FOR THE MUMFORD

AND SONS RECORD "BOX OF RUSTY

METAL THINGS."

I'M GOING TO SAY COST OF

SHIPPING ONLY.

>> Chris: OKAY.

WHICH IN THIS CASE WOULD BE...

WHAT DO YOU THINK?

>> I'M THINKING THREE DOLLARS.

>> Chris: THREE DOLLARS, OKAY.

THREE DOLLARS FOR TOM LENNON.

NATASHA?

THE CROWD ONCE AGAIN BARELY ON

YOUR SIDE.

NATASHA, WHAT ABOUT YOU?

>> THIS LOOKS LIKE... THIS

LOOKS...

(AUDIENCE YELLING SUGGESTIONS)

>> Chris: WHAT IF DREW CAREY DID

THIS?

>> TWO DOLLARS.

>> Chris: TWO DOLLARS.

>> ALSO IT KIND OF LOOKS LIKE AN

ABORTION KIT FROM BEFORE ROE

VERSUS WADE.

>> Chris: THAT WOULD HAVE BEEN

GOOD BRANDING.

BRETT?

>> YEAH, I'M GOING TO GO WITH

$12,000 OR $13,000.

>> Chris: OKAY.

BRETT'S GOING WIHT $12,000 OR

$13,000.

ACTUAL BUY IT NOW PRICE OF RUSTY

METAL THINGS IS FIVE DOLLARS!

TOM LENNON HAS GOTTEN THE

POINTS!

A VERY SPECIAL MOMENT FOR YOU.

BUT YOU ACTUALLY HAVE NOT WON

THE GAME YET, TOM.

I'M SO SORRY.

OUR NEXT ITEM UP FOR BID IS A

BRAND-NEW CAR!

I'M KIDDING, I'M KIDDING.

IT'S NOT, IT'S NOT, IT'S NOT.

IT'S THE OPPOSITE OF THAT.

IT'S ONE OF MY OLD PRESS KITS

FROM 1998.

THIS ORIGINAL VERY LIMITED PRESS

KIT INCLUDES A NICE GLOSSY EIGHT

BY TEN, AS WELL AS A ONE-PAGE

BIO AND FOUR PAGES OF ARTICLE

REPRINTS.

AND IT'S ALL HELD WITHIN A GRAY

FOLDER.

I BOTH REMEMBER AND REGRET THESE

THINGS.

>> WERE YOU READING A SPIDER-MAN

COMIC WHILE YOU GOT YOUR

HIGHLIGHTS?

>> Chris: I'LL GIVE YOU 100

POINTS FOR THAT, NATASHA.

I KNOW, THOSE WERE JUST...

>> I'VE NEVER SEEN A GUY WHO'S

SO OBVIOUSLY GETTING HIS (BLEEP)

SUCKED WHILE HE'S DOING HIS HEAD

SHOT.

>> Chris: ALL RIGHT.

TOM LENNON?

>> WELL IT ALSO FUNCTIONS AS A

CURE FOR VAGINAL DRYNESS.

>> Chris: IT DIDN'T WHEN I HAD

THAT FACE.

>> $35.

>> Chris: WHAT?

$35?

THAT'S MORE THAN RUSTY METAL

THINGS.

NATASHA?

>> I'M GOING TO SAY $67.

>> Chris: $67!

BRETT, WHAT DO YOU THINK?

>> I AM GOING TO SAY...

(AUDIENCE YELLING SUGGESTIONS)

A MOUNTAIN OF COCAINE AND A

BOTTLE OF TEARS.

>> Chris: ACTUAL BUY IT NOW

PRICE OF MY OLD PRESS KIT IS

$19.99!

EVERYONE WAY OVERESTIMATED MY

VALUE IN THE MARKETPLACE.

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