Carmen Lynch - Scoliosis

Sneed, Lynch, Spruyt, Laney Season 8, Ep 0807 12/10/2004 Views: 4,115

Carmen Lynch couldn't model because she had scoliosis. (1:47)

ANY SCOS IN THE HOUSE?

[APPLAUSE]

NO SCOS.

NO CROOKED SPINES?

I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW I HAD

SCOLIOSIS.

MY GYM TEACHER CAUGHT IT IN

THE 8th GRADE.

HE STARTED RUBBING MY BACK

UNDER MY SHIRT.

[LAUGHTER]

YEAH, I THOUGHT HE LIKED ME,

YOU KNOW.

I DON'T KNOW.

WHAT WAS I SUPPOSED TO THINK

WHEN SOMEONE'S TELLING YOU TO

BEND OVER.

I THOUGHT IT WAS LIKE A SEXUAL

POSITION, YOU KNOW.

IT'S LIKE, "OH MY GOD.

WE'RE DOING THE SCOLIOSIS

TOGETHER, YOU KNOW."

AM I STILL A VIRGIN?

[LAUGHTER]

AND IT'S HARD WHEN YOU'RE IN

THE 8th GRADE, 'CAUSE ALL

YOU WANNA DO--

LIKE WHEN YOU'RE TALL IS MODEL,

YOU KNOW.

AND MY MOM'S LIKE, "YOU CAN'T

MODEL YOU HAVE SCOLIOSIS."

[LAUGHTER]

AND I WORE A BACK BRACE AND

I HAD BRACES AND A HEADGEAR.

[LAUGHTER]

I SHOULD HAVE JUST MODELED FOR

LIKE A MEDICAL EQUIPMENT

CATALOG.

YOU KNOW?

[LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE]

SO I LIKE TO TRAVEL, TOO.

WHOO!

YEAH.

I WENT TO JAPAN RECENTLY.

JAPANESE PEOPLE ARE SO PROPER.

THEY'RE SO POLITE.

EVERYTHING THEY DO IS JUST LIKE

SO PERFECT.

YOU KNOW LIKE I EVEN SAW THIS

GUY EVEN LIKE SNEEZED CUTE.

HE WAS LIKE, [GASPING] "AHH."

[LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE]

YOU KNOW.

MEOW.

[LAUGHTER]

I DON'T KNOW HOW THEY DO IT.

I GUESS 'CAUSE THEY'RE PETITE.

I'M TALL AND CLUMSY, YOU KNOW,

SO I'M LIKE, "ACHOO!"

[LAUGHTER]

YOU KNOW.

SOMETIMES I SNEEZE SO HARD I GET

MY PERIOD LIKE A WEEK EARLY.