Mike Sweeney - Understanding Terrorism

Reid, Eaton, Sweeney Season 2, Ep 2 05/25/1993 Views: 425

The American version of terrorism is the postal service. (1:13)

It's so exciting to behere doing runway comedy.

This is so much fun.

Yes, I do live herein New York City.

And I went down to theWorld Trade Center.

It's all fixed.

I swear, I didn't fix it myself.

Those terrorists, though,blew that building up.

You know what myfavorite terrorist was?

The guy who rentedthe van, and then he

tried to get his money back.

He followed the number one mostimportant rule of terrorism--

always keep your receipts.

Apparently, terrorism isa tax deduction in Iran.

It's good to know.

We don't have homegrownterrorists in America.

Unless you countthe postal service.

The postal service-- I was inthe post office the other day.

You know the wantedposter in the lobby?

It turned out it wasemployee of the month.

You know what I realized?

How come UPS and FederalExpress guys never go nuts?

They should use thatin their advertising.

UPS, we're unarmed.