LIKE, WE KNOW WHAT TO EAT.
A WAITER BRINGS YOU SOMETHINGAND SAYS, "YOU CAN EAT THAT."
HE DOESN'T SAY THAT, BUT, YOUKNOW, HE'S BRINGING IT TO YOU.
CAVEMEN HAD TO FIGURE OUTWHAT TO EAT.
I THINK THAT'S BRAVE.
CAVEMEN HADTHE PROCESS OF ELIMINATION.
LIKE, ONE CAVEMANATE A BUNCH OF ROCKS.
AND HE JUST [BLEEP] DIED.
ANOTHER GUY --"NOBODY EAT ANY MORE ROCKS.
"TELL YOUR FRIENDS.CROSS IT OFF THE LIST.
"ALL RIGHT,WHAT DID YOU HAVE TO EAT?
"OKAY, YOU ATE A TREE.ALL RIGHT, HOW WAS THAT?
"YOU'RE DYING? OKAY.
"TREES -- NO.
"JEFF, YOU HAD THE FIRE.HOW DID THAT GO?
HOLY [BLEEP]FIRE -- DEFINITELY NO."
"UH, JILL, YOU HAD THE TURKEY.THAT WAS GOOD? OKAY.
"JACK, YOU HAD THE CHICKEN.GOOD? ALL RIGHT.
"GEORGE, YOU HAD THE TIGER.
GEORGE?"
FIRST GUY TO EAT AN EGG --THAT GUY WAS GROSS.
WASN'T HE?
JUST STARED AT A CHICKEN'S ASSFOR, LIKE, A MONTH.
SEE SOMETHING WHITE AND ROUNDCOME OUT AND BE LIKE,
"I'M GONNA [BLEEP] EATTHAT [BLEEP]
"I DON'T EVEN KNOW WHY.
I'M GONNA PUT IT IN MY MOUTH,CHEW IT UP, AND SWALLOW IT."
"WHAT'S THAT WHITE PEECOMING OUT OF THAT COW?
"GET ME A [BLEEP] GLASS.
"I'M GONNA [BLEEP] DRINK
"WHATEVER'S COMINGOUT OF THIS COW.
I DON'T EVEN KNOW WHY."
[ CHUCKLES ]
THANKS, GUYS.
I LIKE THINKING ABOUTTHE FIRST PEOPLE TO DO THINGS.
FIRST GUY TO SNEEZE.
MUST HAVE SCARED THE HELLOUT OF EVERYBODY.
A BUNCH OF CAVEMENARE HANGING AROUND A FIRE.
ONE OF THEM'S LIKE...[ SNEEZING ]
"CROG'S GONE MAD!"
THEY START KILLING HIMWITH ROCKS.
[ SCREAMS ]
[ LAUGHTER, APPLAUSE ]
SNEEZES ARE SCARY.
I WAS SITTING NEXT TOTHIS OLD LADY ON A BUS.
SHE SNEEZED, LIKE, A HALF-HOUR.
JUST...[ SNEEZES ]
"OH, BLESS YOU."
[ SNEEZES ]"AAH! AAH! BLESS YOU!"
[ SNEEZES ]"SHUT THE [BLEEP] UP!"
[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]