When I was single,I had all these troubles,
because I have one of thosefaces that just says...
♪ If you're crazyand you know it, ask me out ♪
♪ If your mama never loved you,buy me lunch ♪
Sit down and discussyour childhood.
Fun, fun, fun.
Actually, I actuallyhave a boyfriend now.
Women love me.
And now we've beentogether a while now.
We're actuallytrying to have a baby.
I'm gonna tell him real soon.
I'm gonna tell him that.
I'm gonna tell him that...
He's gonna be a great dad.He just doesn't know it yet.
Just... I'm just kidding.
I'm not gonna tell him.
That would completely andutterly ruin the surprise.
I got mugged.
(chuckles):Which is not funny.
One person laughed.Here's what happened.
The guy, he grabbedmy makeup case, and I thought,
"Great, I'm getting muggedby a drag queen.
Only in New York."
Then he grabbed my bag,and he was like,
"I'm gonna hit you!"
So then I said,
"If you hit me,you better knock me out."
Which was stupid.
Don't ever giveyour mugger that option.
Turns out, that was his planin the first place.
So he went to hit me,but I can take a punch.
I went to public school.I know what's coming.
And he hit me, and I went backlike one of those clowns
you had as a kid, like,you punch and it goes back.
I got real cocky.
I was like,"Is that all you got?"
But there was another arm Ishould've been looking out for.
That other onecame out of nowhere.
And this guy lifted meup off the floor
and tossed me asidelike nothing.
And the whole timehe's picking me up,
the only thoughtgoing through my head was,
"Oh, my God, I must havelost so much weight.
"Did you see how he threw me?
"I'm so skinny.
I'm so skinny right now."