Sheng Wang - Old Soul

  • Season 15 , Ep 4
  • 01/11/2011
  • Views: 11,952

Sheng Wang encounters a hard-boiled egg that is way ahead of its time. (2:37)

TRYIN' TO BEHEALTHIER THESE DAYS,

EATIN' MORE FRUITS ANDVEGETABLES, AND, UH...

I ATE-- I ATEA POMEGRANATE.

YOU GUYS EVERHAVE A POMEGRANATE?

[cheers]

THAT IS A--THAT IS A MAGICAL FRUIT.

IT'S LIKE JUICE CORN.

[audience laughter]

IT'S LIKE GODGOT STONED ONE DAY

AND HE WAS LIKE"YOU KNOW WHAT?

"I'M GONNA PUT SOME FRUITJUICE INSIDE THESE KERNELS."

[audience laughter]

"LET'S DO THAT.

BUT I'M NOT GONNAPUT IT ON THE COB...

I'M GONNA SHOVE IT UPTHIS FAT, DIRTY RADISH."

[audience laughter]

I WAS HANGIN' ATMY BUDDY'S HOUSE, RIGHT,

AND MY FRIEND HANDS MEA HARD BOILED EGG AS A SNACK.

[audience laughter]

BUT BECAUSE IT WAS SITTINGIN THE FRIDGE OVER NIGHT

WITH ALL THESELEFT-OVERS,

THE EGG SMELLEDLIKE FRIED CHICKEN.

[audience laughter]

BUT HE DIDN'T TELL MEWHAT HAPPENED, RIGHT?

I GOT THE EGG,I WAS ALL CONFUSED.

I WAS LIKE, [sniff].

"YO... YO, THIS EGG...

THIS EGG ISAN OLD SOUL."

[audience laughter]

CLEARLY, WAYAHEAD OF ITS TIME.

IT'S NOT EVEN HATCHED.

IT SMELLS LIKE A FULLGROWN, TWO PIECE COMBO.

[audience laughter]

[applause]

MY FAVORITE BAR,MY FAVORITE BAR

RECENTLY UPGRADED THEIRPAPER TOWEL MACHINES...

USED TO BEA SIMPLE LEVER.

YOU PULL THELEVER, REAL EASY.

YOU KNOW, YOUGET A PAPER TOWEL

AND NOW THEY GOT A NEW,MOTION-CENSOR TECHNOLOGY.

YOU DON'T HAVETO TOUCH IT.

ALL YOU GOTTA DO IS...

[audience laughter]

WHAT'S UP?

YOU GOTTA SAY "HELLO" TO AROBOT THAT IGNORES YOU, RIGHT?

NOTHIN' HAPPENS.

AND I'M SURE THEY'REWORKIN' ON IMPROVEMENTS,

BUT, IN THE MEANTIME,

IF YOU WANNA DRYYOUR HANDS TODAY,

YOU GOTTA REALLYWANT IT, YOU KNOW?

YOU GOTTAFIGURE IT OUT.

[audience laughter]

YOU GOTTA PUT EFFORT--A LITTLE BACK INTO IT.

YOU GOTTAGIVE IT UP.

[audience laughter]

[cheers and applause]

BY THE TIME YOUGET A PAPER TOWEL,

THERE'S LIKE THREEDUDES DANCING BEHIND YOU,

AND THEN, YOURNIGHT IS DIFFERENT.

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