Kevin Brennan - Drunk Driving

  • Season 1, Ep 8
  • 01/25/1999
  • Views: 3,227

Being the designated driver is dangerous. (1:45)

YOU EVER GO TO THE D.M.V.?

THE D.M.V.-- IS THE LINELIKE REALLY BAD OUT HERE?

I WENT. THE LINE WAS,LIKE, FIVE HOURS LONG

AND THEN THE GUY BEHIND ME,WHENEVER I'D MOVE UP

HE WOULD MOVE UPSO THAT HE WAS TOUCHING ME.

NOW THE POINT IS THERE'S NOREASON FOR HIM TO TOUCH ME.

HE SEES WHERE THE LINE'S GOING.

THERE'S NO TRICKY CURVES.

IT'S NOT DISNEYLAND.

BUT I MOVE UP. HE MOVES UP.

SO I GIVE HIM A DIRTY LOOK.

THAT DIDN'T WORK.

SO THEN I PUT MY ARMSOUT BEHIND MY BACK

PRETEND I'M STRETCHING.

THAT WASN'T WORKING,SO THEN I DID THAT.

I SAW MYSELF IN THE MIRROR.

I LOOKED LIKE A FREAK.I DIDN'T CARE.

INSTEAD OF, LIKE, TELLINGTHE GUY TO BACK OFF

I STARTED TO DO, LIKE,A MICK JAGGER... IMPRESSION.

BY THE TIME I GOT TO THE FRONT

I WAS SPAZZING OUT SO BAD,THEY GAVE ME HANDICAP PLATES

SO, NOW... I CAN PARK ANYWHERE.

THEY ALWAYS...

THEY ALWAYS TELL YOU,"DON'T DRINK AND DRIVE."

YOU GUYS DRINKING?

WELL, DON'T DRINK AND DRIVEUNLESS YOU GOT TO GET HOME FAST.

SERIOUSLY,DO NOT DRINK AND DRIVE.

THEY ALWAYS TELL YOUUSE A DESIGNATED DRIVER.

HAVE YOU TRIED THAT--DESIGNATED DRIVER?

IT'S DANGEROUS. I TRIED IT ONCE.

I WAS DESIGNATED DRIVER.

I'M SOBER.MY FRIENDS ARE ALL DRUNK.

AS SOON AS I TOOK OFF, ONEOF THEM DID THIS TO ME, RIGHT?

WHICH IS NOT GOOD.

I MEAN, IT'S REALLY BAD,AND IF YOU'RE IN HIGH SCHOOL

AND YOU'RE TOO DRUNKTO DRIVE HOME

THEY TELL YOUTO CALL YOUR PARENTS.

YOU KNOW, THEY DIDN'T HAVE THISWHEN I WAS AROUND

BUT, IF I HAD WOKE UP MY DAD

AT 2:00 IN THE MORNING

AND TOLD HIM HE HADTO COME PICK ME UP

'CAUSE I WAS TOO DRUNKTO DRIVE HOME...

MY DAD WOULD HAVE SAID,"WELL, TRY ANYWAY.

"HOW MANY BEERS HAVE YOU HAD?

"SIX? WHAT ARE YOU A ( bleep )?

"GET IN THAT CAR...

"PICK UP YOUR MOMON THE WAY HOME."

Loading...