Andy Haynes - Nazi Barista & Moving to New York

Andy Haynes Season 2, Ep 13 06/14/2013 Views: 13,587

Andy Haynes wonders if Nazis were ever apologetic about being Nazis and discovers that there's no good reason to bring girlfriends to New York City. (2:01)

I was in Seattle one time,

and I was in a coffee shop'cause duh.

And, um...


Watching, uh...

What was that movie called?I forget. Um...

But I was in Seattle,and I was in a coffee shop

and this... I had a outsidecoffee drink, right?

I got a drinkfrom another coffee place.

And the baristagoes like this, she goes,

"Sorry to besuch a Nazi about this,

but you have to takeyour drink outside."

And I... Made me wonderif a Nazi had ever said that.

Like, if a Nazihad ever been like,

"Hey. Sorry to besuch a Nazi about this...

but you guys haveto get on the train."

Yeah. I'm sorry.

I'm sorry about that

(man whoops)

There we go.

There's my neo-Nazis. I...


I, uh...So, I-I lived in Seattle

and then I moved to New York,

and when I moved to New York,I made a big mistake

because I brought my girlfriendfrom Seattle to New York.

And I don't knowif you guys knew this,

New York already hasgirlfriends.

You... don't needto bring a girlfriend there.

They got it covered.They got it all covered.

Bringing a girlfriendto New York

is like bringinga warm beer to a bar

that serves free cold beers.

And everybody's just spillingcold beer all over the place,

and you have to sit there andpretend like you love warm beer.

You're like...(forced chuckle)

"Thanks, I brought my own."

I wish there would've been

a bouncer at the doorto New York that was like,

"Hey, you can't bring thatin here.

There's girlfriends inside."