Roast Battle - Jimmy Carr vs. Earl Skakel

Roast Battle - Night Three - Uncensored Season 1, Ep 4 07/30/2016 Views: 8,152

Jimmy Carr hits Earl Skakel with burns about his family and career, and Earl fires back with quips about Jimmy's uppity attitude and history of tax evasion. (5:32)

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- Woo!

Let's roast! (bell dings)

- Earl is unlike anyone else.

Earl is willing to laugh at himself,

unlike anyone else.

(crowd laughs)

Comedy, comedy is a vocation.

If you can make just one person laugh,

then you're better than Earl.

In fact if you're at home right now watching this

thinking, "I'd love to try comedy,"

then career-wise, you'reexactly where Earl is.

(crowd laughs)(glass shatters)

(glass shatters)

- Wow, Jimmy,

that lasted about as long as your last tax return.

Oh wait, you don't do those.

(crowd ohs)

Jimmy you look like you worked at Hogwarts

which is what girls getwhen they (bleep) you.

(crowd cheers) (Jimmy laughs)

- Pretty good, pretty good.

(spooky music)

I,

I

I cannot believe your mother shared that with you.

(crowd ohs)

Earl was born in California in 1967.

Abortion was made legalin California in 1967.

(crowd laughs)

Those two events have to be linked.

He's like a walking advert for Planned Parenthood.

It looks likeFrankenstein beat AIDS.

(crowd laughs)

(spooky music)

- Jimmy whenever I see you

I expect to see David Beckham around you

'cause you're such a posh (bleep).

(crowd ohs and cheers)

(gun fires)

(Jimmy laughs)

- Well there's,

there's just no denying that.

Also I'm not sure if everyone will be aware of this

but Earl's grandfather

was a multi-millionairephilanthropist.

To give you an idea of how generous this man was,

he's been dead for 61years, and to this day,

he still pays the rent of a47-year-old loser he never met.

(crowd cheers)

(air horn blows)

(Jimmy laughs)

- Good one, Wave.

- Whoa!

(air horn blows

- Jimmy's last name is Carr

because you can fit five guys comfortably inside of him.

(crowd ohs)

(Jimmy laughs)

- [Voiceover] Last joke.

- Oh.

Earl is actually part of the Kennedy clan

as if that familyhadn't suffered enough.

(crowd laughs and ohs)

I guess,

I guess Rosemary Kennedy

wasn't the only one that had a lobotomy

and, typical Kennedy,

he's always shooting his mouth off.

(crowd ohs) (gun cocks)

(gun fires)

- Jimmy I have to hand it to you,

you look really amazing.

I think the last decadeof running from your dad

has really paid off.

(bleep) (crowd laughs)

(bell dings)

- It's Michael!

- Michael, Michael, Michael, Michael.

(crowd cheers)

- Keep it goin'. - [Jimmy] C'mon, these guys.

- Jimmy Carr, Earl Skakel,

and that Wave.

(crowd cheers)

- [Jimmy] The Wave?

(host laughs)

- Jeffrey Roast, who ya got?

That was an (crowd chants)

Hold on, hold on, hold on.

No, no, no, no, no.

No, no, no.- [Crowd] One more joke,

one more joke, one more joke, - [Jeffrey] Hold on, hold on.

- [Crowd] One more joke. - [Jeffrey] Hold on a second.

Hold on a second.

Let's judges weigh in before we--

- Well maybe we should have one more joke

and then the judges may will weigh in.

Not that I consider this a tie.

(crowd cheers)(air horns blow)

Maybe one more regulation joke.

- So you're saying you don't consider this a tie

but you would like to see one more joke, I'll allow it.

- I would still love to see one more joke.

- [Jeffrey] I'll allow it.

- Who doesn't like more jokes?

- Yeah. (Seth laughs)

- Okay, who wants to go first?

- Well his is gonnatake about ten minutes,

so I'll go first.

- Oh!

One more time, let's roast! (bell dings)

- Jimmy actuallypulled a lot of strings

to get into this battle.

The guys right up there

pretending his moments are human.

(crowd laughs lightly)

(buzzer buzzes)

(bleep)

- One less joke, one less joke.

(crowd laughs)

- Earl grew up in Bel-Air next to OJ Simpson

on a street with the Kardashians and Paris Hilton.

It must have been difficult

knowing you were the least talented.

(crowd ohs and applauds)

(gong rings)

(Jimmy laughs)

- Those bits were amazing.

Judges?

Who'd you like in this one?

- First of all I'm giving a standing ovation

to both of these roasters.

That was an amazing roast battle.

(crowd applauds)(air horns blow)

- [Host] Everybody stand up, that was outstanding.

- Just some jokes.

Just some jokes.

- Thank you.

Be seated, be seated.

Who's ready to make their judgment?

Mr. Kimmel or Mr. Rogan?- I'll go first.

- You go.

- James.

- Again, both great.

I mean, obviously froma costuming standpoint,

Earl had the edge coming out.

I will say I thought there were a lot of great jokes

but I could not get past the clipboard.

I'm sorry, Jimmy.

But it was as if you were reading the jokes off the

It was like you were--

- That is exactly what was happening.

(crowd laughs)

Your eyes did not deceive you there, that is.

- [James] Yeah, yeah.

- It didn't seem important enough to learn them.

- I know, it

I should have taken thatinto consideration, but

- Woo.

- I feel like

I feel like you read thejokes off the clipboard

whereas Earl pulled his from his very soul

and so I say, I think Earl won that round.

(crowd cheers)

- Solid, solid.

- Hey,

hey.

Seth Rogen matters. Go ahead.

- I think it's tough.

I gotta start by saying it's tough

and you guys were both incredible and I loved it.

But, so,

I think Jimmy had more like,

it was a more consistent level of wonderful jokes.

That was good. (crowd cheers)

However, I think that Earl brought me to higher highs.

And lower lows, ultimately.

But as someone wholikes to ride that wave

I'm gonna go with the higher highs.

The posh (bleep) and Hogwarts, wonderful jokes.

I'm gonna give it to Earl.

(crowd cheers)

- Sweet.

(crowd cheers and applauds)

(gong rings)

- Go ahead, Jeff.

Your vote doesn't count, but go ahead.

- I do think thatEarl's posh (bleep) joke

was the best joke of the tournament so far.

You know what wasinteresting about this?

This is truly what Roast Battle is about.

Somebody with so much to prove,

somebody like Earl who's never been on television before,

who brought it tonight in a way,

that even as your friend(crowd laughs)

- I was in Real Rob with Rob Schneider.

(gong rings)

- Even as your friend

I didn't think you could be as great as you were tonight.

Jimmy Carr, you're such a(bleep) good guy, a good sport,

to come out here and do this tournament.

- I love this show.

Love it. (crowd cheers)

Love the show. - [Jeff] Thank you, Jimmy.

What's not to like?

The best.

- Jimmy Carr,

you're a class act.

You're a class act all the way, dude.

Now I think Americans will see how funny you are

and know how funny you are.

(crowd laughs)

- And that's what really counts.

- [Host] USA, USA,

USA, USA.

- You literally forgot you were in Canada for the last

(Seth mumbles)

- No, that's not what I'm sayin' at all.

He won this tournament in Canada last year.

Now it's being broadcast in America for the first time.

People don't know Jimmy Carr when I say him in America.

Now they're gonna know this (bleep) guy

and he should be known.- Well, Jimmy.

What Jeff is saying is nobody knows who you are here.

(crowd laughs)

But now they,

now that you've been on

Late Night @midnight. - Late Night Comedy Central.

Yeah.

Sure, this is a gamechanger for me, this is.

- You won't be able to go anywhere.

- This is huge.

- [Jeff] Alright, big shot.

(judges mumble)

- Jeff.

- You were there.

- Jeff, you're not mad are you?

- Jimmy, I'm sorry, I take this very seriously.

- I know.

I'm just saying take it down a notch.

That's all.

(crowd laughs)

- In a major upset, Earl Skakel.

Hug each other, hug each other.