uh, whereI like to read
really crappytabloid magazines.
Like reallybad ones.
Like, my favorite oneis "Cosmo Magazine."
Do any of the ladieshere ready "Cosmo?"
Yeah, wheneverI go to Rite Aid
to pick up my Lexaproand my Ambien,
I always-- I alwaystake a sec to see
what's going on on thecover of "Cosmo" and, like,
what I love about "Cosmo"is it is this magazine
that is pretending tobe your best friend
but "Cosmo"hates you so much.
Like, "Cosmo" justwants to undermine you
and make you insecure.
Like, two real storiesfrom the cover of "Cosmo"
recently, like,one of them was
"How to drive a man wildin under 60 seconds."
And then it was like...and I'm just like,
"When would I everneed to do that?"
Like, when would I ever bein that kind of a rush?
Am I at a toll booth?
You know, like, "I only havea minute to make this guy
jack in my hair and you'relike, "Nah-nah-nah-nah-nah."
And you'relike, "Did it.