Trump's the Worst, Superman's the Best - Uncensored

01/24/2017 Views: 52

Mike Lawrence looks back on the worst election ever, stands up for Superman and reveals the one good thing about awards shows. (2:06)

This election made me feel asexcited as Steve Harvey.

Hosting Family Feud when there'stwo white families that day.

But now that it's over let'sstop saying the two candidateswere similar.

Hilary may be everything that'swrong with politics.

But Trump is everything that iswrong with humanity.

The difference between them isthe difference between.

Getting fucked in the ass by aperson who knows how to properlyfuck you in the ass.

Because they watched someoneelse do it well for eight years.

And getting fucked in the eyesocket by a belligerent failure.

Who at the age of 70 decided-

"Hey it mught be fun to startfucking people in the eyesocket"

And honestly getting fucked inthe eye socket doesn't seem likethe worst idea right now.

Cos at least then I won't haveto see just how terrible thingsare gonna get.

Certain people don't getSuperman.

Including the entire team ofpeople.

That are currently making hismovies.

They think Superman is just agoofy dope with his underwear onthe outside.

That gets outshined by any otherhero on screen.

Not true!

Superman is a hard workingillegal alien.

From far far away.

That got adopted by two nice oldwhite poeple from Kansas.

That didn't even teach him to beracist.

That's way more impressive thana sad billionare named Bruce.

Who's only power is not beingable to let go of some sad shit.

That happened 30 years ago.

Get over it!

Award shoes are overly long.

Masturbatory.

And overlook great outside ofthe box projects.

Because they dont featureslavery....Aids...

Or the Holocost.

But they aren't meanigless.

For every person that wins.

There's a pile of loosers.

Soalking in tuxedos knowing theywon't get the perfect kind ofblowjob.

You only receive when you thankyour wife in an acceptancespeech.

And there is a lot of meetingand watching people who lookbetter than you.

And make more money than you besad.

And feel like as much as afailure as you are.

Which is a really positive wayof thinking about it.