Rocky LaPorte - Birthday

  • Season 9 , Ep 18
  • 06/09/2005
  • Views: 8,532

Rocky LaPorte turned 38 three or four years ago. (2:07)

A BIRTHDAY, I UH, I TURNED 38

LIKE THREE OR FOUR YEARS AGO.

[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE]

THANKS.

ALL RIGHT.

AND MY FRIEND'S THEY GO, "ROCK,

YOU DON'T SEEM THAT OLD."

I GO, "THAT'S 'CAUSE I READ AT

A THIRD GRADE LEVEL."

[LAUGHTER]

KEEPS ME YOUNG.

I UH, YOU KNOW WHAT'S A

TOUGH JOB, LADIES AND GENTLEMEN?

THIS [BLEEP]] THAT I'M DOING.

[LAUGHTER]

I UH, NO I'M KIDDING IS AH

BEING A SCHOOLTEACHER, YA KNOW

THAT?

[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE]

YEAH?

YOU GUYS ARE SCHOOLTEACHERS?

ARE YOU REALLY?

OH, YEAH, WHERE DO YOU TEACH

AT THERE, MA'AM?

Male: PS 13.

Rocky LaPorte: OH REALLY?

UH, I SAID MA'AM AND IT WAS A

GUY'S VOICE.

[LAUGHTER]

GOOD FOR YOU.

WHERE AH, THAT'S IN, 13,

IS THAT IN BROOKLYN?

Male: THAT'S IN BROOKLYN.

Rocky LaPorte: MY UNCLE LIVES

DOWN THERE IN BROOKLYN.

HE'S A DENTIST.

HE HAD A PLACE CALLED,

"HEY, PULL THIS".

[LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE]

C'MON, YOU SEE A PATTERN HERE

OR NO?

[LAUGHTER, CHEERS & APPLAUSE]

HEY, WHAT GRADE YOU TEACH,

MY FRIEND UP THERE WITH THE DEEP

VOICE?

Male: FOURTH.

Rocky LaPorte: I REMEMBER WHEN

I WAS IN...

WHAT ARE YOU IN FOURTH GRADE

LIKE 13, 14?

[LAUGHTER]

NINE?

OH, MAYBE YOU BIG SHOT!

[APPLAUSE]

YOU KNOW HOW THEY SAY YOU NEVER

FORGET YOUR FIRST SCHOOLTEACHER?

I HAD MINE LIKE FOUR YEARS

IN A ROW!

I WAS DATING HER BY THE TIME

I GOT OUTTA THAT JOINT.

[LAUGHTER]

I WAS IN SCHOOL FOREVER.

I WAS THE ONLY KID IN

EIGHT GRADE THAT WAS OVER IN

'NAM.

[LAUGHTER]

I KNOW.

I REMEMBER ONE TIME I WAS

BRINGING MY REPORT CARD HOME,

I GO, "HEY POP, I GOT A "B"

IN READING."

HE GOES, "THAT'S A "D",

YOU IDIOT!"

[LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE]

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