Deb DiGiovanni - Thin Girls

Season 4, Ep 0405 11/13/2009 Views: 5,192

Once October hits, it's safe to go out, because that's when all the thin girls have to put their shirts back on. And then what are they gonna do? Talk? (1:44)

that I'm making in my life.

One of them, seriously,I'm getting in shape this year.

This is the yearI'm getting into shape.

You know, starting...(cheering, applause)

Yeah, starting on Monday, 'causeI have plans this weekend.

But starting on Monday,this is it.

And there's a lot of reasons,too, for getting into shape.

You know, of course,

I can't really competein the summertime.

I can't-- with all the girls.

I see you out there, half-naked,

walking around metabolizingor whatever it is you do.

I don't know.

I'm not a surgeon.

But I don't, I don't try.

I just stay home in the summer,all right?

This is your time, thin girls.

You get the summertime.

You get three months every year.

Live it up, all right?

I stay home till, like, October.

And then it gets cold again,

and then, you know,then I make my move.

You know, 'cause-- yeah.

'Cause at that point,all the thing girls have

to put their shirts back on,you know what I mean?

And then what are they gonna do?(laughs)



Anyway, um,

oh, oh--

(cheering, applause)I know, I know.

I mean...

I should, I should havementioned though off the top

of the show, I do have a bit

of a disclaimerfor my show, everybody.

The fact that I am a big womanhas not affected

my abilityto judge other people.

It hasn't, it hasn't!

Let's judge, oh.

But, no, I went to my doctor,

you know,just to check things out.

And I go and I'm havingmy-my physical.

And my doctor, she's writing upmy little chart.

And she goes and says to meat the end of the appointment,

she's like, "Deborah, justthought I'd let you know

that your uterushas a very long neck."

And I was like, "Well...(laughs)

thank you for noticing."I'm like...

That's weird.

A long-neck uterus?

And then she gave mea prescription for black guys.

So I was like, "All right!"

Now, this is doctor's orders,do you understand?

Doctor's orders.

So if there's, like,a Jamal in the audience,

could you meet me later?

Could you meet me?I'm just gonna say--

I'm supposed to take itwith food, so let's get pizza.

Anyway, I'm supposed to.

God bless. Now, again,you know, my friends,