W. Kamau Bell - Obama

Huntsberger, Esposito, Bell, Lee Season 9, Ep 901 12/23/2005 Views: 38,740

W. Kamau Bell thinks we need a new black leader. (2:15)

WE NEED MORE STRONG BLACK PEOPLE. WHAT WE ACTUALLY NEED

- IS A NEW BLACK LEADER. YES. - [APPLAUSE]

THANK YOU 30% FOR CLAPPING. THE REST OF YOU ARE LIKE,

NAH, WE DON'T NEED A NEW BLACK LEADER.

THE EXPERIMENT IS WORKING PERFECTLY.

[LAUGHTER]

USED TO BE OUR POLITICIANS WERE OUR LEADERS, YOU KNOW.

WHO'S THE MOST PROMINENT BLACK POLITICIAN RIGHT NOW?

CONDOLEEZA RICE? YEE-IKES.

[LAUGHTER]

NEVER BEFORE HAS SO MUCH EVILCOME TOGETHER WITH SO MUCH UGLY.

THAT'S ALL I'M TRYING TO SAY.

[LAUGHTER, CHEERS & APPLAUSE]

NAW, MAN, SHE'S SO UGLY, EVENHER TEETH ARE TRYING TO ESCAPE.

YOU KNOW WHAT I'M TALKIN' ABOUT.

[LAUGHTER]

IT'S LIKE HER TEETH SAID YOU GO LEFT, I'LL GO RIGHT.

- BANG! - [LAUGHTER]

HER TEETH ARE STANDING ON THE CORNER WAITING FOR A BUS

TRYING TO GET THE HELL OUT OF DODGE!

IT'S LIKE THE LOVE CHILD OF NANCY REAGAN AND A ROTTWEILER.

- GRRR! - [LAUGHTER]

THAT'S WHY I HOPETHE BLACK LEADER WE GET IS BARACH OBAMA,

THE BLACK SENATOR FROM ILLINOIS.

[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE]

YEAH. YEAH. THAT DUDE IS COOL.

PEOPLE SAY HE'S GONNA BEPRESIDENT SOME DAY.

MY QUESTION IS PRESIDENT OF WHAT?

'CAUSE ONE DAY THERE MAY BE A BLACK PRESIDENT

BUT THERE WILL NEVER BE A BLACK PRESIDENT NAMED BARACH OBAMA.

[LAUGHTER]

LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, THAT'S TOO BLACK.

THAT DUDE'S NAMEMIGHT AS WELL BE

BLACKIE BLACKERSON.YOU SEE WHAT I'M SAYING?

[LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE]

AND IF PEOPLE WON'T VOTE FOR A WHITE DUDE NAMED JOHN KERRY,

THEY WILL DEFINITELY NOT VOTE FOR A BLACK DUDE NAMED

BARACH OBAMA.

WHO'S RUNNING FOR PRESIDENT?UM, BARACH OBAMA.

BLACK OSAMA? UH-UH.

THAT IS TWO THINGS I DON'T LIKE.

THAT'S LIKE A ROTTEN CHERRY ON A CRAP SUNDAE. NO THANK YOU.