you need to, like,test the waters.
You need to-- you know,
you don't want to wasteeach other's time.
And a good way to do that
is to shush your partnerin public.
Yeah, it sounds bad,but whatever.
But wait--wait until they're speaking
about somethingthey really believe in.
In front of peoplethat you both respect.
Like right before the election,
we were having some friendsand whatever,
and she's like, "I'm gonna votefor Obama because..."
And I was like...
Men are talking."
I didn't do it, I didn't do it.
But if you really wantto find out
if, like, it's going to workthere for you, here it is:
you whisper somethingreally awkward
in, like, a sexual situation.
Give you a great readon the situation.
Like right-- just the other daywe were about to go to sleep
and she's like,"Ah, say something to me."
I was like, "All right.
(whispering):I wish you had a penis."
But she didn't miss a beat.
She turned right aroundand she's like...
(whispering):"I wish you had a penis."
(laughing):We have so much in common,it's unbelievable.
I'm sorry, though,like, whispering is--
if we can agree on this--it's inherently creepy.
There's something weirdabout it.
Like, you can say something ina normal voice and nobody cares,
but if you whisperthe exact same thing,
Like, for example, on a normal,you know, regular, everyday,
you can go up to some strangerin a normal voice,
you can be like, "I love kids,"and it's no big deal whatsoever.
You see where I'm going,what I'm talking about.
But you cannot go up to some mom
at, like, a grocery...
...and be like, "Psst.
(whispering):I love kids."
(laughter and applause)
(laughs)I love doing that
on the subway here in New York
'cause it's, like, the mostentertaining thing to do
on the subway isto wake somebody up.
Th-They'll believe anythingthat you say
for the next threeor four seconds.
They don't know.
I'm, like, "Sir, you've gotto wake up.
You got to wake up now."
"Where am I?"