Chris Hardwick - Hitler 'Stache

Chris Hardwick: Mandroid Season 1, Ep 1 11/10/2012 Views: 8,372

Chris Hardwick wants to know why strippers name the most awesome thing in the world after the worst person in the history of mankind. (1:52)

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They groom their areasin very specific ways,

and they haveweird names for it.

Like, do you know whatit's called when a lady

grooms everythingbut a superfluous square of hair

above the awesomenessunderneath?

Do you knowwhat it's called?

Not the landing strip.

The landing strip is whenit's rectangular.


Like a runway

facing the wrong way.

You don't land on a ladythis way.

If you get naked with a dudeand you feel this,

you need to get your shitand go home.

He's bad at sex.

I'm not amazing at it,

but I know it's not supposedto feel like a car wash,


No, when it'sa perfect square,

they call it"the Hitler 'stache."

Because it is square,like Hitler's mustache.

Really, strippers?

Was "Charlie Chaplin patch"taken?

'Cause he wasa little more fun than Hitler.

Why would you name

the most awesome thingin the world

after the worst personin the history of mankind?

First of all, I don't evenunderstand the philosophy

behind this grooming.

Like,shave it off or don't.

Like you don't mow partof your lawn and go,

"I'm leaving the part bythe door 3 inches taller."

Like, it's all one length.

Why leave that piece?

Is that last little topiary justto remind gentlemen callers,

"Just to let you know you'renot about to [bleep] a baby."


And I am not a Hitler fan

by any stretchof the imagination,

but do you really feellike this was the legacy

he intendedto leave on mankind?

"One day I hope that womenwill shave their [bleep]

"in the shape of mein schnurrbart!

Attack Poland!"