John Oliver - Courageous and Epic

  • Season 3 , Ep 3
  • 08/03/2012
  • Views: 19,586

A man who threw a hot dog at Tiger Woods owes John Oliver no explanation. (2:37)

THE WAY THE WORLD IS NOW,

IT'S MORE AND MOREIMPORTANT THAT

WHEN SOMETHING TRULYHAPPY AND JOYFUL HAPPENS

WE CHERISH A MOMENTLIKE THAT.

LET ME GIVE YOU SUCH AN EXAMPLE.

TOWARDS THE END OF LAST YEAR,

A MAN THREW A HOTDOGAT TIGER WOODS.

(laughter)

LET ME--LET ME REPEATTHAT SENTENCE FOR YOU

'CAUSE I DON'T THINKYOU COULD'VE HEARD IT CORRECTLY.

A MAN THREW A HOTDOG--

AND WHEN DID YOU LOSE

YOUR SENSE OF WONDER,NEW YORK?

WHEN DID YOUR CHILDISH SENSE

THAT TRUE MAGIC WOULD POSSIBLYDESERT YOU

FOR THE FINAL TIME.

TIGER WOODS WAS PUTTING...

AS HE LIKES TO,AND A MAN--

I DON'TKNOW HOW TO SAY THIS,

HE THREW A (bleep)HOTDOG AT HIM.

AND WHEN THIS MAN WAS ASKEDWHY HE DID SUCH A THING,

EVEN THOUGH HE OWEDUS NO EXPLANATION...

(laughter)

HE SAID HE WAS INSPIREDTO DO IT

AFTER WATCHINGTHE MOVIE "DRIVE."

(laughter)

LET ME GIVE YOUHIS EXACT QUOTE,

BECAUSE I DON'T WANTTO GET THIS WRONG.

HE SAID, "AS SOON ASTHE MOVIE ENDED...

I THOUGHT TO MYSELF

I HAVE TO DO SOMETHINGCOURAGEOUS AND EPIC."

(laughter, cheers and applause)

I HAVE TO THROW A HOTDOGAT TIGER WOODS.

ISN'T IT GREAT HOW WE CAN ALLHAVE OUR OWN PERSONAL DEFINITION

OF THE WORD EPIC.

FOR NEIL ARMSTRONG, IT WASWALKING ON ANOTHER PLANET.

FOR ROSA PARKS, IT WAS REFUSINGTO MOVE TO THE BACK OF THE BUS,

AND FOR THAT DUDE,

IT WAS TO SEE THE WORLD'SEX NUMBER ONE GOLFER

AND THROWINGA HOTDOG AT HIM.

WHO'S TO SAY WHICH OF THOSETHREE ACTIONS WAS THE GREATER?

IT'S TOO SOON TO SAY.

HISTORY WILL BE THEIR JUDGE.

THE POINT IS,THE WHOLE LAST YEAR

HAS BEEN DEFINED BY PROTEST.

YOU LOOK AT THE ARAB SPRING,

RIPPING ACROSS THE MIDDLE EASTOVER THE LAST 12 MONTHS.

PEOPLE RIOTING IN THE STREETSBECAUSE THEY HAD HAD ENOUGH.

THEY DIDN'T NEED TO BE RIOTON THAT SCALE IN THIS COUNTRY.

THINGS FUNDAMENTALLYAREN'T THAT BAD,

BUT THAT MAN'S FRUSTRATIONCOMES FROM THE SAME PLACE.

IT COMES FROMREACHING HIS LIMITS,

BEING PUSHED TOO FAR.

IT COMES FROM LOOKINGAT TIGER WOODS,

THINKING ABOUT EVERYTHINGHE NOW REPRESENTS AND GOING,

UGH.

I FEEL BETTER.I HOPE EVERYONE ELSE DOES.

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