as the Obama administrationis coming to a close,
uh, unemployment has plungedto a nearly nine-year low.
When Obama came to office,it was at 7.8%.
Now it's at 4.6%,
which is really good.
but-but, you see, America'sfuture is not about being good--
it's about being great.
REPORTER: Trump promised to keep Carrier jobs in the U.S.
He says Carrier's gonna bringback those jobs to Indiana.
He, as president,will make it happen.
I'm gonna call up Carrier,
and I'm gonna tell the headof Carrier,
"I hope you enjoy your stayin Mexico, folks,
"but every single unitthat you make
"and send across our border,which now will be real,
you're gonna pay a 35% tax!"
And you knowwhat Carrier's going to do?
They're going to call mein 24 hours,
and they're going to go,"Mr. President,
"we're moving backinto the United States,
we're going to buildin the United States."
-(applause and cheering)-That's what's going to happen,
Man, say what you wantabout Trump,
but he really kicks assin imaginary negotiations
"Then Carrier's gonna saythey're sorry,
"and everyone will shoutmy name.
"Then, Rosie O'Donnellwill be like,
"'Donald rules, and I drool.'
"Then the failing New York Times will print a headline
"that says,'Air-Conditioner Factory Stays,
-Trump Keeps His Cool.'"-(laughter)
"And it'll be a great pun, andeveryone will laugh at the pun,
"and they'll say,'Great pun, Donald!',
because they'll knowit was really my pun!"
And by the way, by the way,it's easy to see
why Trump wants moreair-conditioning in America.
-Look at his face there.-(laughter)
He was sweating so much,he looks like
he's doing an impressionof Fat Bastard.
-Like, what is he...what is he doing? -(laughter)
(with Scottish accent):"Get in my country."
But... but...and this is crazy.
Once Trump won the election,he actually did it.
He got on the phone,negotiated with Carrier,
and he made his first deal.
WOMAN: The air-conditioninggiant tweeted last night,
"We are pleasedto have reached a deal
"with President-elect Trump& VP-elect Pence
to keep close to 1,000 jobsin Indy."
MAN:The deal is extremely popular.
60% of registered voters saying
it gave them a morefavorable view of trump.
After Trump's deal, some peoplesee him in a better light.
"He saved 1,000 peoples' jobs,and he grabbed zero pussies?
"Maybe we should givethis guy a chance!"
But beforeyou give him a chance,
you may want to examine theCarrier deal a little closer,
because,like Donald Trump's hair,
-there's something that's justa little off. -(laughter)
Numerically,there are some... issues here.
Donald Trump,during his speech, said
that there were about1,100 jobs saved.
It turns out it's probably morelike 800 jobs that were saved,
300 that he was referring to
were actually never goingto move in the first place.
It's not a sustainable strategy
to save 800 or 1,000 jobsat a time.
WOMAN: The deal gives the heating
and air-conditioning company seven million dollars
in state tax breaks over ten years.
What Trump is doing is settinga very dangerous precedent.
My guess is today,there's some corporation
who may not have thought onesecond about leaving America--
now they're going to announce,
"Hey, we're going to Mexico,we're going to China.
Hey, Mr. Trump,what you gonna do for us?"
-Bernie! -(applause and cheering)
We should have listened to you,Bernie!
You know every timeDemocrats see Bernie Sanders,
they're like, "Damn,I wonder what could have been."
But he's right.
It's not sustainable forthe government to pay companies
to keep uncompetitive jobsin the country.
But now that other companieshave read
Carrier's blackmail script,
they could alsothreaten to leave
and wait for those sweet, sweettax breaks to roll in.
It's like that children's book.
If you give a mouse a cookie,
he's going to want to (bleep)you in the ass.
-(laughter) -You guys hadthe same book, right?
-It's the same book.-(laughter)
And by the way, by the way,
I love how Donald Trump made itlike,
"I told Carrier what to do,and they did it!"
No, no, no,that's not what happened.
They threatened something,Trump paid them the money,
and they still sent hundredsof jobs to Mexico.
Like, Trump would be the worsthostage negotiator in the world.
He would be just like,"Come out with your hands up!
"Free all the hostages!
"All right, you asked for it!
We're sending in a milliondollars and more hostages!"
"All right, cover me, boys.
I'm going in to give hima hand job. Cover me."
(applause and cheering)
-(audience whooping)-Worst negotiator ever.
Oh, there's another aspectof this deal,
uh, but it has good newsand bad news.
The good news is:Carrier has agreed
to invest more moneyinto their factory.
The bad news is:it's gonna be like Westworld.
Updating the plantwill result in more automation
and an important consequence.
We're gonna make a $16 millioninvestment in that factory...
That sounds good,except they're doing it
to automatethe manufacturing process,
which will shed jobs.
As bad as this deal is,
what makes this so goodfor Donald Trump
is that it gives the illusion
that he's donesomething meaningful.
That's what Trump is all about,is the show.
Because allthe headlines say is:
Trump saves a thousand jobs!
Which, don't get me wrong,I acknowledge is something
for every single personwhose job was saved.
I don't deny that.
But at the scale the presidentis supposed to work on,
that's barelya drop in the bucket.
It's all about"the thousand jobs."
What about everyone's jobs?You got to create jobs as well.
This is basically a classiccon man move, you know?
A con man makes you focuson what you think you can get,
and distracts youfrom everything
that you stand to lose.
-(applause)-That's all it is.
look, the Carrier dealmight have some benefits.
But it would be naive to ignoreall of the side effects.
In fact, I have a proposal.
Every timeTrump makes a promise,
he should be forcedto include the fine print.
And you know whatCarrier's gonna do?
They're gonna call mein 24 hours
and they're gonna go, "Mr. President,
(fading): we're moving backinto the United...
WOMAN: Donald Trump's promises are not intended
to be taken seriously.
The number of jobs will be lower than promised.
Side effects could include massive corporate tax breaks,
higher consumer costs,
and companies giving the jobs to robots anyway.
Ask your doctor if your economy is healthy enough for Trump.
He'll probably say no, but (bleep) him,
make America great again.
-(applause)-Sounds good to me.