Rickey Smiley - Church Announcements

  • Season 10, Ep 1
  • 02/16/2006
  • Views: 32,738

SHE WAKE UP ON THE WRONG SIDE OF THE BED EVERY SUNDAY MORNING

BUT SHE HAVE TO GIVE YOU THIS INFORMATION.

YOU DON'T WANT THE INFORMATION,

BUT SHE HAVE TOGIVE YOU THE INFORMATION

AND EVERYBODY KNOWS SHE PUT HER OWN TWO CENTS ON TOP OF--

EVERYBODY, THE WHAT, THE CHURCH ANNOUNCEMENTS.

GIVE IT UP FOR BERNICE JENKINS AND THE CHURCH ANNOUNCEMENTS.

[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE]

♪ [RHYTHM AND BLUESGOSPEL MUSIC PLAYING] ♪

[LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE]

GOOD MORNING.

GOOD MORNING.

GOOD MORNING.

WE WANNA WELCOME ALL OF OUR VISI-TORS

TO THE OH, LORD,HOLD MY MULE

WHILE I SHOUT MISSIONARYEVANGELISTIC EPISCOPAL

BAPTIST CHURCH OF GOD IN CHRIST AME, CME...

- [MUSIC CONTINUES] - [LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE]

HERE'S OUR CHURCH ANNOUNCEMENTS AS FOLLOWS:

THE PASTOR HAS ASKED THAT OUR REALLY DARK-SKINNED MEMBERS

PLEASE SIT IN THE LIGHTDURING EVENING SERVICES.

THE PASTOR HEARD VOICES AND THOUGHT IT WAS DEMONS.

[LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE]

DUE TO RECENT TERRORIST ATTACK AND THE HORRIBLE WAR IN IRAQ,

PASTOR WILL NO LONGER BAPTIZE BABIES WITH THE NAMES

MOHAMMED, RASHID, ABDUL OR KADEEM.

YOU WANNA BE BAPTIZED,GO DOWN TO MOUNT MORAL,

- WE AIN'T DOIN' IT NO MORE. - [LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE]

HUH? SAY WHAT?

[LAUGHTER]

WHEN?!

I JUST TALKED TO HER THE OTHER DAY.

AIN'T NOBODY CALL ME AND TOLD ME NOTHING!

- HAAAA! - [LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE]

I TELL 'EM.

[ORGAN SWELLS]

[LAUGHTER]

THE LORD CALLED MISS JOHNSON HOME

THREE MONTHS AGO.

[LAUGHTER CONTINUES]

THE FUNERAL WILL BE IN TWO WEEKS.

THE FAMILY WAITIN' ON THE INSURANCE POLIC...[CHUCKLING].

[LAUGHTER, CHEERS, WHISTLES AND APPLAUSE]

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