Sandra Bernhard - Actresses on the Lot

Tim Thomerson & Johnny Steele Season 1, Ep 0164 02/24/1992 Views: 714

Actresses never stop to hear you say hello and how you hate their work. (2:12)

CUTE SHOES?

Man:GREAT.

YEAH, THEY'RE LITTLEMANOLO BLAHNIK BOOTIES.

SOMETHING SIMPLEFROM THE FALL COLLECTION

WITH MIZRAHI AND BLAHNIK.

JUST APRES GYM, LIKE A GIRLWHO JUST HAS TO RUN TO A MEETING

SO SHE THROWS ON SOMETHINGTHAT'S, LIKE, WORKS AT THE GYM

BUT THEN WORKS AT A MEETING.

( laughter )

NO, ACTRESSES IN HOLLYWOOD

LIKE, IF YOU RUN INTO THEMAT THE LOT, YOU KNOW

WHICH I VERY RARELY GO TOFOR A MEETING--

YOU'LL SEE THEM, LIKE, ACROSS,THEN YOU'LL GO, "OH! OH, HI!"

AND THEY'LL JUST GO...

( laughter )

AND ACT LIKE THEY'REREALLY IN A BIG RUSH

AND THEY SHADE YOU DOWNAND IGNORE YOU.

I GO, "I'M SORRY,I JUST WANTED TO SAY HI.

I HATE YOUR WORK."

( laughter )

DO YOU KNOW WHAT?

I'VE BEEN NOTICINGA DISTURBING TREND

AMONG CERTAIN PEOPLE LATELY.

I WAS DOWNIN PALM SPRINGS AND...

HANGING OUT ON A DINAH SHORECLASSIC WEEKEND...

( laughter and clapping )

AND THIS REALLY, REALLY,SUPER-BUTCH DYKE HIT ON ME.

I GOT REALLY FREAKED OUT.

AND WE WERE TALKING FOR A WHILE,AND I JUST WAS, LIKE, "OH, GOD.

PLEASE JUST, LIKE,LEAVE ME ALONE."

AND IT TURNED OUTTO BE BRUCE JENNER.

I WAS SO...

( laughter and hooting )

( laughs )

WHY IS... THE WORLD ISTURNING UPSIDE TOPSY-TURVY.

THERE IS ALL THESE MENWHO LOOK LIKE HARDCORE LESBIANS.

HAVE YOU NOTICED?

( laughter )

I'M DOING SHTICK.

I GOT TO GO GET DE-SHTICKEDAFTER THIS.

( laughter )

I'M ACTUALLY DOING THINGSTO GET LAUGHS.

I'VE NEVER DONE THAT IN MY LIFE.

IT'S, LIKE, ANYTHING JUSTTO MAKE THEM LAUGH, PLEASE.

DEAR GOD, I'M SCARED.

( laughter )

NO, I'M NOT, NOT REALLY.

WELL, WE HAVE A BIG SHOWCOMING UP TONIGHT.

( laughter )

IF YOU'RE A NARCOLEPTIC.

NO, I'M JUST...

( laughter )