Chris D'Elia - Drinking in New Orleans

Chris D'Elia: White Male. Black Comic. Season 1, Ep 101 11/20/2013 Views: 23,678

Chris D'Elia explains the not-so-subtle differences between male and female drunken behavior. (1:39)

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THANK YOU FOR COMING OUT HERE,MAN.

NEW ORLEANS -- ALL RIGHT,THIS IS AWESOME, MAN.

Man:[ SHOUTS INDISTINCTLY ]

D'Elia: YEAH, MAN.CAREFUL WITH THAT, MAN.

[ LAUGHTER ]

PEOPLE IN NEW ORLEANSARE ALWAYS DRUNK.

[ LAUGHTER ]

ALL THE TIME.

IT'S LIKE 11:00 IN THE MORNING,

AND PEOPLE ARE JUST LIKE[GRUNTS DRUNKENLY]

[ LAUGHTER ]

"WHATEVER!

"DRINK IT.LET'S BRING IT OUTSIDE.

WE CAN DRINK OUTSIDE, MAN."

PEOPLE GET DRUNK, MAN.DUDES GET DRUNK.

NOBODY GETS MORE DRUNKTHAN A GIRL, MAN.

[ LAUGHTER ]

YEAH, GIRLS GET WAY DRUNKERTHAN DUDES.

YEAH. NO, IT'S TRUE.GIRLS GET DRUNK.

[ Slurring ]"HEY, YOU KNOW WHAT?

UH, EXCUSE ME. UH..."

[ LAUGHTER ]

[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]

[ Normal voice ] I ALWAYS KNEWWHEN MY EX WOULD GET

WAY TOO DRUNK 'CAUSE SHE WOULDALWAYS SAY THIS.

[ Slurring ] "GUESS WHAT?YOU DO THE MATH."

[ LAUGHTER ]

[ Normal voice ]LIKE, "YO, I DID THE MATH.

EIGHT SHOTS EQUALS TOO MANY."

[ LAUGHTER ]

[ Slurring ]"YEAH, EXACTLY, EXACTLY.

SO, UH, WHAT'S YOUR POINT?WHAT'S YOUR POINT?"

[ LAUGHTER ]

"EXACTLY, YEAH. EXACTLY!"

[ LAUGHTER ]

[ Normal voice ]GIRLS GET DRUNK, MAN,

THEY ACT LIKEIT'S AN ACCOMPLISHMENT.

THEY'LL HAVE ONE TOO MANY DRUNKS

AND BE LIKE,[Slurring] "WE MADE IT!"

[ LAUGHTER ]

"WHOO! WE DID IT! WE MADE IT!

OOH, OOH!"

[ LAUGHTER ]

"DA-DA!"

[ Normal voice ]WHAT DID YOU MAKE?