And I always had to sitin the back in the middle,
'cause I hadthese two older brothers
who were,who were absolute nightmares.
Like, I really disliked,I hated them when I was little.
They're all right now,but, like, when I was little,
they were so mean.
I remember when I was five,
I was, like,made this promise of, like,
"As soon as I am as bigas these men are,
"they will die.
"But for now, these handsare not strong enough.
"So we will settle
for placing our wiener intotheir mouthwash."
Which is a thing I did one time.
That's a thingyou only ever do one time.
It burns so bad.
It's crazy, it's crazy.
It happened 23 years ago,
and I can tell youevery event of that day.
That's what the pain was like.
I just remember being,like, five
and, like,going into their bathroom
and getting their Scope outand being like,
"They ain't gonna like this."
Uh, I put my wiener in it,and it didn't touch anything,
so I remember I had to, like,
press it against my skinand, like, lean back.
So it, like, cascaded down.
And the pain is immediate.
It doesn't need to soak.
Just right away, I was like,
"You've madea terrible mistake!
He knows not what he does!"
It's the first timeI'd ever been hurt
but couldn't tellmy mom about it.
You know what I mean?
Like, up until that point,there were no secrets.
This was the first secretI ever had.
But, like, after it happened,I was like,
"We're gonna go downwith this one, baby." Like...
I just knew I couldn't.
Like, anything else,I could go
up to my mom and be like,"Mom, I jumped off the roof.
I broke my back."
She'd be like,"Well, don't do that."
But I knew for thisI couldn't be like,
"Mom, I put my wienerin mouthwash!"
"Why?""'Cause I hate your children.
Because you did a nightmare job,to be honest."