Kevin Meaney - Snoring

  • Season 2 , Ep 7
  • 07/02/1999
  • Views: 3,196

Kevin Meaney's wife hates it when he snores. (3:05)

HOME TO ROAD RAGE.

"OUT OF MY WAY!"

( imitating guns firing )

OH, IT'S GREAT TO BE HERE.

ANYBODY VACATIONING HERE?

YEAH!YEAH!YEAH!

VERY GOOD.

I JUST GOT MARRIED RECENTLY

SO THAT'S... THAT'SVERY EXCITING.

THANK YOU VERY MUCH.

WE HAD A BEAUTIFUL WEDDING.

YOU CAN'T THROW RICEAT A WEDDING ANYMORE.

"DON'T BE THROWING THE RICE.

"THROWING THE RICE-- THE BIRDSWILL EAT IT AND EXPLODE.

"THEN YOU'LL BE HAPPY,WON'T YOU

WITH DEAD BIRDSALL OVER THE PLACE?"

SO WE DIDN'T THROW RICE.

WE ACTUALLY THREW UNCLE BEN.

"DON'T BE THROWING UNCLE BEN.

"AL SHARPTON WILL BE PROTESTINGIN FRONT OF THE HOUSE.

"THROWING THAT MAN.

THAT'S NOT RIGHT."

YOU KNOW,NOW THAT WE GOT MARRIED...

WHEN WE WERE DATING

SNORING WAS NEVER A PROBLEMFOR MY WIFE, YOU KNOW?

IT WAS ALWAYS

"OH, LAST NIGHT,YOU WERE SNORING.

"IT WAS SO CUTE!

"YOU'RE LIKE A BIG BEAR.

"I WATCHED YOU SNOREALL NIGHT LONG.

"YOU REALLY REST WELL.

"SO PEACEFUL.

"I WAS AFRAID.

THAT'S WHY I WOKE YOU."

NOW, A YEAR AND A HALFDOWN THE ROAD

IT REALLY DOESN'T MATTER,YOU KNOW?

IT'S A TOTALLY DIFFERENTWOMAN NOW.

"STOP SNORING!

"STOP IT!

STOP THE ( bleep ) SNORING."

"I'M SORRY."

"I CAN'T SLEEP!

STOP IT, STOP IT, STOP IT,STOP IT, STOP IT."

SHE'S POKING MEAND SHUSHING ME...

I SAID, "IF YOU HIT ME AGAIN,I'M CALLING THE POLICE.

YOU CAN'T BE HITTING MELIKE THAT."

YOU KNOW? AND SHE STARTS...

NOW SHE HAS A BAG OF SHOESNEXT TO THE BED.

"STOP IT! STOP THE SNORING!"

THEN SHE STARTS CRYING.

"I CAN'T TAKE IT.

"I'VE GOT TO LEAVE THE ROOM.

( sobbing ):"I CAN'T TAKE IT.

"I NEED TO SLEEP.

I'M LEAVING THE ROOM."

"THEN LEAVE.

"GET OUT!

"LEAVE THE ROOM.

LET ME GET SOME REST."

I NEVER HAD A PROBLEMSNORING BEFORE.

NOW IT'S BECAUSE OF HER,YOU KNOW.

AND THEN SHE GOES,"YOU HAVE TO GO TO THE DOCTOR.

YOU HAVE TO GO TO THE DOCTORAND HAVE YOUR FLAP TAKEN OUT."

"MY FLAP?!

"HOW DO YOU THINK I MAKEA LIVING, HONEY?

I USE MY FLAP."

NOW WE GOT TO TRY ANYTHING.

IT'S THOSE "BREATHE RIGHTS" NOW.

THE BREATHE RIGHT-- THAT'S THETHING I'M WEARING NOW TO BED.

BREATHE RIGHT-- A WOMAN HAD TOCOME UP WITH THAT IDEA, RIGHT?

"BREATHE RIGHT, 'CAUSE YOU'REBREATHING WRONG."

I GO TO BED, I'VE GOT ONE ON.

I WAKE UP THE NEXT MORNING,THEY'RE ALL OVER MY BODY.

I WAS CONSTIPATED FOR A WEEK.

I HAD A BREATHE RIGHTBACK THERE!

WE MOVED OUT TO CALIFORNIA,AND MY PARENTS

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