Arnez J - Tennessee Talk

  • Season 7 , Ep 27
  • 08/28/2003
  • Views: 28,554

The way people talk in Knoxville, TN is something to see. (3:10)

AND I WANT TO SAY THIS

REAL QUICK.

MY SON-- AND THANK THE PERSON

THAT ASKED ABOUT MY SON--

MY SON IS A BASEBALL PHENOM.

HE'S 11-YEARS-OLD.

HE'S STEPPING UP TO THE

13 AND 14 YEAR-OLDS.

OKAY, HE'S STEPPIN' UP.

OKAY, NEW YORK, HE'S STEPPIN'

UP.

HE'S NOT 17 PLAYING WITH NINE.

OKAY, HE'S STEPPING UP.

HIS NAME IS NOT DIOMOSQUE.

BUT IT'S LIKE THIS.

BASEBALL IS HIS GAME.

HE PLAYS EVERY POSITION AND HITS

FROM BOTH SIDES OF THE PLATE.

WE JUST FINISHED PLAYING--

I THOUGHT WHERE I LIVE IN

ATLANTA, GEORGIA WAS COUNTRY--

WE JUST PLAYED THE LITTLE LEAGUE

WORLD SERIES IN KNOXVILLE,

TENNESSEE.

OH, IT SOMETHING TO SEE.

AND LET ME TELL YOU THIS EVENT

THAT HAPPENED FROM FRONT TO

BACK.

THEN I'M GOING TO SPEED IT UP

FOR YOU HOW IT LOOKED IN MY

EYES.

WE WERE AT THE GAME.

THE BLEACHERS ARE FILLED.

AND ALL OF A SUDDEN THIS LITTLE

TEAM CALLED KNOXVILLE STARS

IS ABOUT--

ALL OF 'EM ABOUT 10-YEARS-OLD

AND ABOUT THIS TALL--

ABOUT RIGHT HERE.

I MEAN THEY ARE TRACTOR FED--

I MEAN NOT CORN FED,

TRACTOR FED.

AND ONE OF THE LITTLE GUYS

COMES IN THE DUGOUT.

HE GOES, "ALRIGHT, WHO DUN IT?

WHO DUN IT?"

AND THEN YOU HEAR SOMEBODY GO,

"WHAT?

WHATCHA TALKIN' ABOUT?

WHATCHA TALKING ABOUT?"

"WELL, WHO DUN IT?

WHO DRANK MY GATORADE?

Y'ALL KNEW I WAS GOING TO BE

'IRSTY!"

AND I SAID TO MY FRIEND, "DID I

JUST HEAR SOMEBODY SAY 'IRSTY'?"

[LAUGHTER]

AND THEN--

I GUESS THE OTHER KIDS ARE LIKE,

"WADN'T ME."

"WADN'T ME."

"WADN'T ME."

AND I GUESS HE FOUND OUT

WHO DID IT, 'CAUSE HE SAID,

"BUB, BUB, IT WAS YOU, BOBBY."

BOBBY SAY "NA-UH. NA-UH."

HE SAID, "YEAH, YOU DID,

'CAUSE YOU KNEW I WAS GOING

TO BE 'IRSTY."

SO BY THIS TIME, WE'RE IN

THE BLEACHERS CRACKING UP,

AND OUR MOUTHS IS LIKE THIS,

'CAUSE WE CAN'T BELIEVE WHAT

WE'RE HEARING.

HE RUNS OUT OF THE DUGOUT.

AND HIS MOM--

AND THIS IS WHEN I THOUGHT OF

FORREST GUMP--

HIS MOM IS IN A BIG--

HE GOES, "MOMMA, MOMMA!"

SHE GOES, "WAAT IS IT?!"

SOON AS SHE SAID THAT,

"WAAT IS IT?!"

HE SAID, "MOMMA, CAN YOU BUY ME

ANOTHER GATORADE?"

SHE SAID, "WELL, WHAT HAPPENED

TO THE GATORADE I BOUGHT YOU?!"

HE SAID, "MOM, BOBBY DRUNK IT."

AND BOBBY CAME OUT OF THE

DUGOUT, "NA-UH, NA-UH."

HE SAID, "YEAH, YOU DID BOBBY,

'CAUSE YOU KNEW I WAS GOING

TO BE 'IRSTY."

[LAUGHTER]

SO AT THIS TIME, THE DAD--

I DON'T KNOW WHERE HE WAS--

HE JUST JUMPED OUT, "WELL, HEY,

I BOUGHT ALL Y'ALL SOME GATORADE

IF YOU GIST GIT ON BACK IN THAR

AND PLAY SOME BAWL!"

AND THE LITTLE DUDE SAY,

"WELL, I DON'T WANT NO GATORADE

FROM YOU, 'CAUSE YOU AIN'T

MY DADDY NO MORE."

NOW THIS IS THE WHOLE THING

THAT I HEARD.

NOW I'M GOING TO SPEED IT UP

FOR YOU, LET YOU HEAR HOW I SAW

IT IN MY MIND FROM FRONT TO

BACK.

"ALRIGHT, WHO DUN IT?

WHO DUN IT?"

"WHAT YOU TALKIN' ABOUT?"

"IT WASN'T ME."

"WHAT ARE YOU TALKIN' ABOUT?"

"WHO DUN IT?

WHO DRANK MY GATORADE?

YOU ALL KNEW I WAS GOING TO BE

'IRSTY."

"WADN'T ME."

"WADN'T ME."

"WADN'T ME."

"YO, BUB, IT WAS YOU."

"NA-UH.

NA-UH."

"YES, YOU DID, BOBBY, 'CAUSE

YOUR LIPS ARE PURPLE AND YOU

KNEW I WAS GOING TO BE 'IRSTY!"

"MOMMA, MOMMA!"

"WAAT IS IT?"

"MOMMA, CAN YOU BUY ME

A NEW GATORADE?"

"WAAT HAPPENED TO THE GATORADE

I BOUGHT YOU?!"

"BOBBY DRUNK IT."

"NA-UH.

NA-UH."

"YEAH, YOU DID, BOBBY,

'CAUSE YOUR LIPS ARE 'IRTY.

YOU ARE DIRTY AND YOU KNEW I WAS

GOING TO BE 'IRSTY!"

"WELL, HELL, I BOUGHT ALL Y'ALL

SOME GATORADE.

JUST GIT ON BACK IN THAR

AND PLAY SOME BALL."

"I DON'T WANT NO GATORADE

FROM YOU, 'CAUSE YOU AIN'T

MY DADDY NO MORE."

[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE]

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