Noah Gardenswartz - A Wise Child

Noah Gardenswartz Season 5, Ep 1 08/26/2016 Views: 635

While tripping on acid, Noah Gardenswartz encountered a smart little girl who blew his mind. (0:00)

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I tried aci last year for thefirst time

(scattered whooping)


I've about eight minutesleft up here,

and then I'll talkto all of you.


But I'd always heard acidwas a good drug

to do outdoors in nature.

I live in New York City.

Not a lot of places to go.

So I ate the acid,and I went to Central Park.

And I found the big lakein the middle of Central Park.

I found a nice little rockby the side of the lake.

And I was just sitting there,minding my business,

watching the ducksfloat on the water.

About ten minutes go by,I turn to my right,

and there's a young little girlsitting next to me on the rock.

And she looks up at meand she goes,

"Hey, mister,you want to hear a riddle?"

And I was like,"Absolutely.

"I've never wantedto hear a riddle

"so badly before in my life.

What you got, kid?"

And she goes,"What's the beginning of end,

"the end of time,

and the beginning and endof everywhere?"

And I was like, "Whoa..."

Like, does she knowI'm on acid right now?

I'm expecting how much woodwould a woodchuck chuck

if a woodchuckcould chuck wood?

She's coming at meabout space and time.

Wasn't ready for it,so I asked her to repeat it.

She said,"What's the beginning of end,

the end of time, beginningand end of everywhere?"

Does anyone know?WOMAN:E!

The letter E.

Some shit she read on the backof a Laffy Taffy wrapper

almost altered my existence.


The point is, though,if you're ever in the park,

and you see a grown man

intensely talkingto a young girl,

don't assume the worst, okay?

He could just be on acid.

I ate the acid

as an artist, hoping for somekind of creative epiphany.

The next day,I checked the notepad

that I brought with meto the park.

The only thingI had written down was:

"Can ducks evertruly enjoy a Saturday,

or are they alwaysjust trying to survive?"


guess it waspretty good acid.