Corey Holcomb - Hookers

Martin, Holcomb, Bergreen, The Amazing Johnathan Season 4, Ep 0401 01/01/2001 Views: 13,799

Corey Holcomb defines "hooker." (1:39)

THE SHOW.

(CHEERS AND APPLAUSE)

I'M GHETTO.

I AIN'T GOT NO SHAME.

I'M EXTRA GHETTO.

I GOT TWO SIX-YEAR-OLDS AND THEY

AIN'T TWINS.

(AUDIENCE AW'S)

BUT, ANYWAY, WHILE I'M UP HERE,

I WANT TO BE BLUNT AND TO THE

POINT.

IS THAT COOL?

>> AUDIENCE: YEAH!

>> COREY: ALL RIGHT.

SO, UM, ANY HOOKERS IN HERE?

(LAUGHTER)

HOOKERS NEVER SPEAK UP WHEN YOU

GIVE THEM AN OPPORTUNITY.

I'M CONFIDENT THAT THERE ARE

HOOKERS IN HERE.

WHAT IT IS, SEE, MAYBE YOU'RE A

HOOKER AND YOU DON'T KNOW YOU'RE

A HOOKER.

I CAN FIX THAT.

LET ME EXPLAIN SOMETHING.

IF YOU HAVE EVER RECEIVED

ANYTHING BESIDES LOVE AND

AFFECTION FOR YOUR BODY,

YOU A HOOKER.

(LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE)

NOW, STAND UP AND BE ACCOUNTED

FOR.

'CAUSE I GOT A COUPLE OF EXTRA

DOLLARS, YOU KNOW.

I PAY FOR IT SOMETIME.

I DON'T WANT NO GIRLFRIEND.

I DON'T NEED NOBODY SCRATCHING

UP MY CAR.

GOOD LUCK TO ALL OF THE GUYS OUT

ON YOUR FIRST DATE.

I KNOW THAT'S TOUGH.

YOU'RE OUT ON THE FIRST DATE.

YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT'S GONNA

HAPPEN AFTER THE SHOW.

IT'S ROUGH.

I KNOW HOW IT IS.

YOU'RE TOO SCARED TO ASK FOR

WHAT YOU WANT.

(LAUGHS)

YOU TAKE A GIRL OUT, SPEND ALL

YOUR MONEY, GET THAT LITTLE KISS

ON THE CHECK AT THE END OF

THE NIGHT.

GOOD-BYE.

(LAUGHS)

THAT NEVER HAPPENS TO ME,

YOU KNOW.

I ASK FOR SEX WHEN I SHOW UP AT

THE DOOR FOR THE DATE.

(APPLAUSE)