Wali Collins - Bad Pets

  • Season 1 , Ep 7
  • 01/11/2011
  • Views: 2,656

Woolworth's was great because you got to buy a pet and lunch in the same place. (1:24)

(Walli Collins)WOOLWORTH'S, MAN.

THEY HAD ANIMALSIN WOOLWORTH'S, YO.

ANY PLACE WHERE YOUCAN GO BUY ANIMAL

AND YOUR UNDERWEAR,AND THEN WALK OVERTHERE AND HAVE LUNCH...

WE GOT OUR FIRST PETFROM WOOLWORTH'S.

WE GOT TURTLES.

COST 29 CENTS.

BRING IT HOME, LIVEDABOUT 10 MINUTES.

SEVEN YEARS OLD...HEARTBROKEN.

DAD...

(sniffles)MYRTLE'S DEAD.

MY FATHER'S CHEAP, DIDN'TCARE, SAID, THAT'S OKAY.

NOW SHE'S A FRISBEE!

SHE WAS A PET,NOW SHE'S A TOY.

YOU SEE, SON, THAT'SCALLED RECYCLING.

BUT THEY WERE ON SALE

BECAUSE THERE'S SOMETHINGWRONG WITH THEM.

YA KNOW, THEY WERE,LIKE, USED PETS.

THEY HAD ONE-EYEDGERBILS IN THERE.

HEY, HOW YA DOING?

THEY CAN ONLY GO LEFT.

SOME NASTY RAGGEDYBIRDS IN WOOLWORTH'S...

FOUR BIRDS--ONE FEATHER.

THEY HAD FISH INTHERE--CAN'T SWIM,

HOLDING ONTO THE EDGE.

OH, NO, I HAD LUNCH.

GOTTA WAIT AN HOUR!

DON'T PUSH ME.

AHHH, WHO'S SPLASHING?

SOMETIMES, MA--THEY WOULDHAVE A DOG IN THERE, MAN.

BUT YOU KNOW SOMETHINGBE WRONG WITH IT.

IT'D HAVE A BARKINGIMPEDIMENT.

IT'S IN THE CAGEGOING, BOWWW.

BOWWW...

ARFF.

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