Nick Swardson - Magical Friend

Ford, Swardson, Y'all Season 2, Ep 0202 06/13/1998 Views: 21,440

Nick can't compete with his magician friend. (2:10)

AND I'M PSYCHED ABOUT THAT, BUT

I WANT TO SHOW UP

AS LIKE THE FIRST THINGI WANTED TO BE WHEN I WAS YOUNGER.

REMEMBER YOU WERE LIKEFIVE YEARS OLD AND YOU WERE LIKE,

MAN, I'M GONNA DO THIS.

I'M GONNA DO IT, I SWEAR.

BUT IT WASN'T LIKE A REAL JOB.

THAT'D BE COOL IF YOU SHOWEDUP AND EVERYBODY'S LIKE,

"HOW'S IT GOING, NICK ?"

"YEAH, IT'S ME, BOB, REMEMBER ?

"YEAH, I'M A REAL ESTATE AGENTNOW AND I'VE GOT MY OWN COMPANY.

"JIM'S A LAWYER AND HE'S GOT HIS OWN FIRM.

WHAT ARE YOU DOING ?"

I AM A NINJA.

I RULE THE NIGHT.

"THAT'S COOL, MAN."

THIS IS A COOL JOB, THOUGH.

MY FRIEND'S GOT THE COOLEST JOB.

ONE OF MY BEST FRIENDS IS A PROFESSIONAL MAGICIAN.

SERIOUSLY MAN,

IT'S SO COOL.

IT'S SO UNEXPECTED,WE GO TO PARTIES.

HE'S THE BEST TO HAVE AT THE PARTY

'CAUSE ALL THESE DRUNK PEOPLE COME UP LIKE,

"HEY, WHAT ARE YOU GUYS DOING ?"

"NOTHING, LET ME SEE THAT BEER.

NOW IT'S A BIRD."

THE GUYS LIKE, "YOU'RE THE DEVIL.

"DUDE, GO AWAY, MAN.

"THE DEVIL'S AT THE PARTY.

"I DON'T WANT HIM HERE.

GET HIM OUT."

IT'S COOL, MAN.

BUT THE ONLY DOWN-SIDE TO HAVING A MAGICAL FRIEND,

IS HE ALWAYS INVITES US ON DOUBLE DATES

LIKE THE REST OF HIS FRIENDS.

AND THAT'S THE WORST

BECAUSE I'M A NICE GUYBUT HE'S MAGIC.

LIKE I CAN'T, THERE'S NO WAY I CAN COMPETE WITH THAT.

HE SHOWS UP, HE'S SO SMOOTH,GIRLS LOVE HIM.

HE'S LIKE, "HOW'S IT GOING ?"YOU LOOK SO BEAUTIFUL TONIGHT.

"YOUR HAIR, IS THAT A COIN ?

"NOW IT'S A ROSE.

NOW IT'S MONEY."

AND SHE'S LIKE,"MAGIC MAN I NEED YOU.

"THE MAGIC INSIDE.

"BRING IT ON.

"OH, THE MAGIC.

"THE MAGIC.

I NEED IT."

AND I SHOW UP, WHAT AM I GONNA DO, I'M LIKE,

HI, I BROUGHT YOU THIS ROSE.

NOW IT'S BROKEN.