Nick Swardson - Best Party Text Ever

Season 1 , Ep 101 10/11/09 Views: 100,749

After a night of serious partying, Nick Swardson's friend sends him the best party text he's ever received. (1:28)

Watch Full Episode

MY FAVORITE THING WAS--

LAST SUMMER,I GOT THE BEST PARTY TEXT

I'VE EVER GOTTEN,FROM A FRIEND OF MINE.

I SAW--I RAN INTOONE OF MY FRIENDS,

JAYMO, AT A BAR,

LAST FOURTH OF JULY.

AND HE WAS LIKE--YOU KNOWWHEN YOU RUN INTO A BUDDY

WHEN YOU'RE BAR HOPPING,YOU'RE LIKE,

"WHAT'S UP, BLAH BLAH BLAH.I'M WASTED."

AND YOU JUST LIKE,"I'LL SEE YOU LATER, BYE."

AND THEN YOU JUST GO.

[laughing]SO THAT HAPPENED.

AND I CALLED HIM THE NEXT DAY,OR I TEXTED HIM,

I'M LIKE, "HEY, HOW DIDYOUR NIGHT END UP?"

AND THIS WAS HIS EXACT TEXT,MY FAVORITE THING EVER.

HOW DID YOUR NIGHT END UP?AND HE TEXTED ME BACK:

"DUDE," DOT DOT DOT.

THAT'S A GOOD START,YOU KNOW.

"DUDE...PUNCHEDMY BEST FRIEND IN THE FACE,

BROKE UP WITH MY GIRLFRIEND,AND SHIT MY PANTS."

YES!

[cheers and applause]

THAT IS A GOLD MEDALRIGHT THERE OF PARTYING.

WHEN YOU GOTO THE PARTY OLYMPICS,

YOU JUST BROUGHT HOMETHE GOLD.

AND THE BEST PARTIS RIGHT AFTER THAT,

HE WROTE,

"I DON'T KNOW WHICH ONETO TAKE CARE OF FIRST."

WHICH IS TRUE, MAN.

YOU GOT A DILEMMARIGHT THERE.

WHICH SITUATIONDO YOU REPAIR?

I SAY GIRLFRIEND.

ADDRESS THAT.

JUST SO YOU CAN SEETHE LOOK ON HER FACE

WHEN SHE'S LIKE,"IS THAT SHIT?"

AND YOU CAN BE LIKE,"I MADE IT FOR YOU.

YOU DON'T APPRECIATEANYTHING."

Loading...