Mike Vecchione - Neighborhood Watch

  • Season 15 , Ep 12
  • 01/11/2010
  • Views: 4,290

After exercising vigilante justice, Mike Vecchione runs into the woods like the Incredible Hulk. (1:03)

Vigilante jus-- You knowit's against the law

to let your dog go to thebathroom and not scoop it?

In New York,that's against the law,

and there's a lot oflawbreakers in my neighborhood,

'cause there's little landminesof dog poopy everywhere.

You know what I installed--"One man neighborhood watch."

Some people will callit a "peeping tom."

I call it "one manneighborhood watch."

I hide in the grassy knoll--I wait for an offender.

See somebody offend--I don't say anything.

Man of action--I run out.

I scoop it--I throw it at them.

[applause]Yes.

[cheers]

You should see thelook on their face when

their own negligence is comingat them at high speeds.

Then, I say somethin'very vigilante, like,

"you've just beenpotty trained, bitch-- Snap!"

Then, I run into the woodslike the Incredible Hulk.

I wake up two hours later,naked and flexing,

like a youngLou Ferrigno.

[audience laughing]

Thank you,People over 30.

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