I temped a lot.
Uh, does anybody here ever temp?
(scattered applause and whoops)Doesn't matter.
Don't know why I'm asking.
Temping stinks,because you're always
in somebody else's cubicle.
They're awayon their maternity leave
or on their vacation,
and you're in their cubicle
with all their crappy crapthat you hate,
like their stupid cat calendar
and their cockeyed pictureof their ugly family.
Got to put that down,don't want to look at that.
One time I'm in thiswoman's cubicle,
and this woman hadwhat seemed like
thousands of Post-it notesin her cubicle.
Like she was trying to solvethe Kennedy assassination.
And there were two Post-itsright in my field of vision
that were driving me crazythe entire time.
The first one said,
"Three steps to fix error 285."
And it said,"One: log in as 'admin.'
Two: run detectand repair sequence."
And, "Three: reinstall Excel."
Then, right beside that,I swear to God,
she had a Post-it that said,
"Three ways to be more happy."
And it said,"One: be more honest.
Two: free your heartfrom hatred."
And, "Three, expectthe unexpected."
And I think the danger there
is that you goto be more honest,
but you accidentally justreinstall Excel, you know?
Or for seven years,
you're like,"Why am I not happy?!
"I'm logged in as 'admin'!
"I hate my son;is that on the server?
Get I.T. down here."