Mike Britt - Period Commercials

  • Season 2 , Ep 5
  • 02/17/2012
  • Views: 4,231

Mike Britt believes that period commercials should be more realistic. (1:36)

AND PEOPLE GETTING UPSET.

WHY WE GETTIN' UPSET-- WHY--I DON'T UNDERSTAND.

WE DON'T EVENRESPECT MARRIAGE,

WHY YOU WORRIEDABOUT THEM DOING IT?

[audience laughter]

COME ON, MAN-- THE DIVORCERATE IS LIKE 70%.

RIGHT-- AND THE CATHOLICCHURCH LIKE, "THIS IS GONNA--"

HEY, Y'ALL NEEDTO SIT DOWN.

Y'ALL GOT SOME OTHERSHIT TO DEAL WITH.

DEAL WITH YOURPEDI-PRIESTS

BEFORE YOU OVER HERE WORRYIN'ABOUT THEM, RIGHT?

PENIS AND VAGINA AIN'TDOING TOO GOOD TOGETHER.

MAYBE TWO PEE-PEESCOULD WORK.

MAYBE TWO PEE-PEES WORK.

LADIES, I'M TIRED OFYOUR PERIOD COMMERCIALS.

WHY IS THERE SOMANY OF THEM,

AND WHAT PERIOD IS THISY'ALL BE EXPERIENCING

IN THESE COMMERCIALS?

THESE CHICKS BE RUNNING THROUGHA FIELD WITH DAFFODILS,

RIGHT-- CARTOON BUNNIES BEHOPPIN' BEHIND THEM, LIKE--

WHAT PERIOD IS THIS?

RIGHT-- AND A LOT OFTIMES, I DON'T KNOW WHY,

BUT THEY BE SPINNIN'.

[audience laughter]

ON A PERIOD-- I THINKTHE PERIOD SHOULD REFLECT

WHAT IT'S REALLY LIKE,THE COMMERCIALS.

RIGHT-- SOON AS IT COME ON,THERE SHOULD BE A PTERODACTYL

WITH TWO MEN INTHE CLAWS LIKE...

"AH!"

SNAPPIN' TURTLES,SEALS GETTIN' CLUBBED,

LAVA SHOOTIN' OUT OFVOLCANOS, BUILDINGS CRASHING,

SLAVERY'S BACK.

[audience laughter]

TWO SLAVES HOLDINGA TAMPON BOX.

WHAT THE [bleep] YOU DOIN'SPINNIN' DURING YOUR PERIOD?

YOU BLEEDIN'!

THE LAST THING YOUNEED IS CENTRIFUGE.

[audience laughter]

IN FACT, THE COMMERCIALSSHOULD BE LIKE THIS.

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