I'M KINDA CRAZY.
I AM.
I HAVE VOICES IN MY HEAD.
BUT THEY SPEAK IN SPANISH,
AND I HAVE NO IDEA WHAT THEY'RE
SAYING.
[LAUGHTER]
THAT'S IRRITATING.
I WISH ONE OF 'EM WOULD GET A
JOB.
[LAUGHTER]
THEY'RE MY VOICES, DON'T WORRY
ABOUT 'EM.
WHAT'S A GOOD TIME FOR ME?
I'LL TELL 'YA.
MY FAVORITE ROBE, SOME YOGURT,
AND AN EPISODE OF
TRADING SPACES.
OH.
THEN I'M IN HEAVEN.
[CHEERING]
DO YOU LOVE TRADING SPACES?
I DO.
I WOULD NEVER BE ON THAT SHOW,
THOUGH.
YOU WANNA KNOW WHY?
'CAUSE YOU HAVE TO TRUST YOUR
FRIENDS TO DECORATE YOUR HOUSE.
YOU HAVE NOT MET MY FRIENDS.
[LAUGHTER]
THEY DO NOT HAVE MY BEST
INTEREST AT HEART.
'CAUSE IT'S ALWAYS SOME
OVER-THE-TOP, ECCENTRIC INTERIOR
DESIGNER COMIN' IN, GOING, "OH,
MY GOODNESS, I LOVE THIS PLACE.
THIS IS WHAT I'M THINKING FOR
YOUR FRIEND'S HOUSE.
CIRCUS TENT.
BIG CIRCUS TENT.
[LAUGHTER]
DO YOU THINK YOUR FRIEND WOULD
LIKE A CIRCUS TENT?"
"OH, YEAH, HE'D LOVE
A CIRCUS TENT."
[LAUGHTER]
"NO, NO, NO, YEAH.
WHY DON'T YOU GO DIG UP
THE HARDWOOD FLOORS, GET DOWN
TO THE DIRT.
THAT WAY, THE PONIES WILL
FEEL AT HOME."
[LAUGHTER]
"GREAT.
WE'RE UNDER BUDGET."
[LAUGHTER CONTINUES]