Scared Celibate - Uncensored

Child, Please Season 1, Ep 2 09/21/2016 Views: 4,422

In health class, the kids are paired off into parenting teams to take care of a robotic baby. (1:39)

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[school bell ringing]

[funky hip-hop music]

- Oh!all: Ooh!

Hey, how do my nuts taste?

[laughter]- He should've walked away.

- Nice try, skeet scrub.

Now get to the back of the buswith the rest of the shit crew.

[laughter]

- Class,settle the fuck down.

Now as a part of our"Scared Celibate" curriculum,

I will be partnering you upto raise a goddamn baby.

- What you mean, raise a baby?

Can't we just go toPlanned Parenthood?

I got a coupon!

- How am I supposed to go leagueif I got daddy responsibilities?

[all complaining]

- Oh, shut the fuck up!

I present to youthe Totbot 3000.

[Totbot 3000 coos]

Now for the next week,you gotta pretend

this robot isa motherfucking baby.

- [groans]

- Now it's time topair you bastards up.

Milk, you with Shamal.

- Man, I gotta booswith this wank-ass...

Aight, I'ma be cool'cause you my boy's sister,

but I gotta tell it like it is.

I ain't doin' 'nathen.

I'm keepin' it real,like Grover's dad.

- That's fine,as long as we're together.

- Jamal, I'm putting youwith Medina.

- [growls]

- Damn, Medina.

Can a ledge getsome breathing room?

You like a meat sweater.

- Don't get coy with me,motherfucker.

We together,so you better get used to

me gettin' up inside you.

- Cindy, I thinkit'd be good for you

to be paired up with...Grover.

- Oh, word?

[classmates react]

- Come on, Coach.

You know Cindy and Ibelong together.

She's my lady.

- Nice try, motherfucker,

but we've got our first gamethis week.

We don't need you stickingyour energy in the wrong place.

So your partner is LaDante.

We progressivelike a motherfucker.

[laughter]

- Brandy, you gonna bemy wife for life.

On Oakland.

[smooches, slurps]

- No!