DC Curry - End of the World

  • Season 3 , Ep 12
  • 08/24/2000
  • Views: 11,410

God's not white, but he's not black either. (3:56)

BUT AMERICAISN'T HUMBLE SOMETIMES.

GOT A BIG EGO PROBLEM.

IF YOU LET AMERICA--LET THE MEDIA TELL YOU

EVERYTHING MAJOR--ALL THE MAJOR TECHNOLOGY--

WAS CREATED IN AMERICABY AMERICANS.

ALL OF THE RECENT INVENTIONS

THAT HAVE BROUGHT TECHNOLOGYTO WHERE IT IS WERE FROM HERE.

HENRY FORD INVENTED THE CAR,

AND THE AIRPLANE WASBY THE WRIGHT BROTHERS.

THE TELEPHONE, GRAHAM BELL;

AND ELECTRICITY, THOMAS EDISON.

AND WHAT WASEVERYBODY ELSE DOING

WHILE WE WERE BUSYTHINKING OF EVERYTHING?

WHAT WERE THE CHINESE DOING,EATING RICE?

WHAT WERE THE JAPANESE DOING,PRACTICING MARTIAL ARTS?

NOBODY INVENTED ANYTHING MAJOREXCEPT US.

THE MEDIA WOULD EVEN HAVE YOUBELIEVE GOD WAS AN AMERICAN.

GOD WASN'T AN AMERICAN.

THEY CREATEDTHE BIG Y2K MAYHEM,

AND WE WENT OUTAND ACTED LIKE FOOLS

WHEN THE YEARWAS ROLLING OVER INTO 2000.

SPENT BILLIONS OF DOLLARS.

EVEN COMPUTER EXPERTSAND HIGH TOP EXECUTIVES

SPENT BILLIONS OF DOLLARSFIXING THE COMPUTERS

SO NOTHING WOULD HAPPENWHEN IT ROLLED OVER.

THOUGHT MAYBETHE END OF THE WORLD WAS COMING,

AND WHEN IT CAME,NOTHING HAPPENED.

NOT A DAMN THING HAPPENED.

NOW, A LOT OF USDIDN'T HAVE COMPUTERS,

BUT WE DID SOME OTHERIGNORANT STUFF,

LIKE WE UNPLUGGED THE MICROWAVEOVEN SO IT WOULDN'T GO OUT.

MY FATHER CRANKED THE CAR UPAND LET IT RUN

FROM '99 TO 2000,

SAYING THAT WHEN IT SWITCHEDOVER, THE CAR MIGHT NOT START.

BUT IT DIDN'T STARTHALF THE TIME IN 1999,

SO I REALLY DON'T SEEWHAT THE BIG DEAL WAS.

MY MAMA FILLED UP THE BATHTUBWITH WATER

BECAUSE SHE HEARD THERE WASGOING TO BE A REVOLUTION

OR THE END OF THE WORLD.

AND IF SHE SURVIVED,

SHE WANTED TO MAKE SURETHE TOILET WOULD FLUSH.

I TOLD MY MAMA,

"IF THE END OF THE WORLD COMEAND YOU HAPPEN TO SURVIVE,

"WHERE YOU [bleep]OUGHT TO BE YOUR LAST CONCERN.

"YOU COULD GO NEXT DOORAND USE THE TOILET

"AND THENJUST COME BACK HOME.

"YOU COULD DO ITOUT IN THE FRONT YARD.

"NOBODY'S AROUND BUT YOU.

"OR YOU COULD JUST USETHE BATHROOM ON YOURSELF.

YOU'VE DONE THAT BEFORE, MAMA."

I WAS DETERMINEDNOT TO LET THE MEDIA GET TO ME

WITH ALL OF THAT HYPE.

I DIDN'T BELIEVE IN IT.

I KNOW THE MEDIA WILL BRAINWASHYOU IF YOU LET THEM,

BUT TO THINE OWN SELF BE TRUE.

YOU GOT TO GO WITH WHATYOUR MIND TELLS YOU TO DO,

AND THAT'S WHAT I DID.

BUT AS THE DAY NEARED,IT STARTED GETTING TO ME.

IT STARTED WEARING AND TEARINGON MY MIND,

SO ON THE NIGHT OF NEW YEAR'S--

ON NEW YEAR'S EVE--

IT REALLY HIT ME THAT THIS MIGHTBE THE END OF THE WORLD.

SOMETHING MIGHT HAPPEN.

SO I SAT ON THE BACK PORCHIN MY UNDERWEAR

WITH A SHOTGUNAND SOME EXTRA SHOTGUN SHELLS,

THINKING THERE MIGHT BEA REVOLUTION.

THEN ABOUT 10:00 AT NIGHTIS WHEN IT HIT ME.

THAT'S WHEN I CAME TO MY SENSESAND REALIZED,

EVEN IF GOD WAS GONNA ENDTHE WORLD AT THE END OF 2000,

WHY WOULD HE DO ITON PACIFIC COAST TIME?

HE WASN'T FROM LOS ANGELES.

AND I HEARD THE TV.

I HAD THE TV ON IN THE HOUSE,AND I COULD HEAR IT.

AND IT WAS ALREADY 2000IN SOME OTHER FOREIGN COUNTRIES,

SO WHY WOULD GOD WAIT AND ENDTHE WORLD ON AMERICAN TIME?

THAT'S WHAT I WONDERED;HOW STUPID CAN I DAMN BE?

GOD WASN'T FROM LOS ANGELES.

HE WASN'T AN AMERICAN.

BUT THE MEDIA--THE AMERICANMEDIA IS SO EGOTISTICAL,

THEY WOULD HAVE YOUBELIEVE THAT.

GOD WASN'T AMERICAN.

A LOT OF PEOPLE BELIEVE GOD ISWHITE; GOD AIN'T WHITE.

AND IF HE WAS WHITE, HE WOULDN'TEND THE WORLD ANYWAY.

HE'D STAND BACKAND LET SOMEBODY ELSE END IT.

THEN IF IT TURNED OUT GOOD,

HE'D STEP UPAND TRY TO TAKE CREDIT FOR IT.

AND IF IT TURNED OUT BAD,HE'D STEP BACK AND SAY,

"I KNEW NEGROES WAS GONNAMESS UP THE WORLD I CREATED."

GOD WASN'T WHITE.

GOD WASN'T BLACK, EITHER.

AND IF HE WAS BLACK,

HE'D END THE WORLDLIKE HE SAID HE WOULD,

BUT IT WOULDN'T BEAT MIDNIGHT.

IT WOULD BEABOUT 12:30, 12:35.

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