Jeff Ross - The Black Sheep - Uncensored

Season 1 , Ep 101 09/19/11 Views: 339,897

Jeff Ross explains why Martin Sheen and Emilio Estevez were unable to attend Charlie Sheen's roast. (1:28)

INSTEAD OF GETTINGHIS LIFE TOGETHER

CHARLIE WENT OUT ONA NATIONAL COMEDY TOUR...

WHERE EVERY NIGHT, CHARLIE,YOU WALKED ON STAGE

AND YOU TOLD THE AUDIENCEYOU WERE A WARLOCK FROM MARS.

OH, MAYBE YOU ARE.

BUT I'LL TELL YOUWHAT YOU'RE NOT--

A COMEDIAN FROM EARTH.

CHARLIE SHEEN IS TO STAND-UP

WHAT LARRY FLYNTIS TO STANDING UP.

CHARLIE,IF YOU'RE WINNING,

THEN SOMETHING'S WRONGWITH THE FUCKING SCOREBOARD.

COME ON, MAN.

CHARLIE,IF YOU'RE WINNING,

THEN THIS MUST NOT BEA CHILD CUSTODY HEARING.

THE ONLY TIME YOUR KIDSGET TO SEE YOU IS IN RERUNS.

CHARLIE, DON'T YOU WANT TO LIVETO SEE THEIR FIRST 12 STEPS?

YOU'RE THE BLACK SHEEPOF A FAMILY

RESPONSIBLE FOR THREE"MIGHTY DUCKS" MOVIES.

YOU MAKE YOUR OWN FATHER ASHAMED

THAT HE SHARESTHE SAME FAKE NAME AS YOU.

MARTIN SHEENAND EMILIO ESTEVEZ

SAID THEY WOULD HAVEBEEN HERE TONIGHT,

BUT THEY HADA FAMILY OBLIGATION.

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