Paul F. Tompkins - Beta Only Pt. 2

Ali Wong, Travon Free, Paul F. Tompkins Season 4, Ep 7 09/06/2013 Views: 10,033

Paul F. Tompkins has an idea for how to make downtime at his video store job pass a little bit faster. (2:35)

And I workedthe night shift

with a young man named--

Young man named Jeff.

We were night shiftpartners at Beta Only.

And so, uh,

we would sometimespass an entire shift

in utter silence,

because the whole reasonI took this job

was that I thought, I'll justget to watch movies all day.

Right? Wrong.

Because it seems the ownersof the Beta Only video store

could not scare upa videomax player

to have in their Beta Onlyvideo store.

So after a coupleof weeks,

we would just sit therein complete silence

like an old,married couple

who realize they shouldn'tbe together anymore,

but they didn't really wantto be alone.

So one night,

after four hoursof stony silence,

an idea occurred to me.

And I turned to Jeffand I said,

with great meaning,

"Jeff, I'm awful tired."

Well, this sparkedsome interest in Jeff.

Jeff said,"I'm tired too."

Well, the wheels startedturning, ladies and gentlemen.

"Jeff," I said,

"I propose to youthat we take naps at work."

Jeff was intrigued.

He said, "How would this work?Do we--

Do we nap in shifts?"

I laughed.

"Ha, ha.Oh, Jeff, dear boy.

"I put it to you

that we shall napconcurrently."

Well, this was allJeff needed to hear.

He immediately laid his littlehead down on the counter.

And I crawledinside the counter,

which was empty.

Because what were we goingto put in there?

Our bags of money?

I slide the door shut

and boom,I was out instantly.

Next day I get to work.

The manager says,"Paul, I need to talk to you."

And I think, Oh! Napgate.