Eugene Mirman - Tea Party Profiles Pt. 1

Eugene Mirman: An Evening of Comedy in a Fake Underground Laboratory Season 1, Ep 101 12/14/2012 Views: 5,807

Eugene Mirman visits a website that's like Facebook for people who hate roads. (2:22)

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YOU WANNA TALK ABOUTTHE TEA PARTY;

UM, THEY'RE A LOT OF FUN.

WHEN THEY FIRST BEGAN,I WAS REALLY CURIOUS.

LIKE, I WANTED TO READABOUT THEM AND LEARN ABOUT THEM.

AND SO I WENT ONLINE,

AND I STARTED READINGTHIS SITE,

BUT YOU COULD JUST SEESOME PROFILE PICTURES.

YOU COULDN'T REALLY ACCESS IT

'CAUSE IT WAS BASICALLYLIKE FACEBOOK

BUT FOR PEOPLE WHO HATE ROADS.

AND SO I HAD TO MAKEAN ACCOUNT,

AND THEN ONCE I DID,I COULD ACCESS IT,

AND I COULD SEEPEOPLE'S PROFILE PICTURES

AND ALL THIS STUFFABOUT THEM,

AND I WANTEDTO SHOW YOU STUFF.

AND YOU COULD SEETHEIR FAVORITE BAND,

WHICH WAS ALWAYSTHOMAS JEFFERSON.

HE SAID SOMETHINGABOUT TYRANNY AND DRUMMING.

BUT THESE ARE SOMEOF THE PROFILE PICTURES.

THIS IS A LOVELY COUPLETHAT LOVES FALL,

BUT HATES THE DEPARTMENTOF EDUCATION.

THIS IS SOMEONE I LIKE TO CALLEVIL STAN LEE.

[laughter and applause]

SOME PEOPLE, INSTEAD OF PUTTINGA PICTURE OF THEMSELVES,

WILL PUT SOMETHINGTHAT MEANS A LOT TO THEM.

THIS IS, UH,SOMEONE'S PROFILE PICTURE.

IT'S A MACHINE GUN.

AND AT THE BOTTOM,YOU CAN SEE THEIR TOES.

VERY GOOD AT MACHINE GUN,

NOT SO GOOD AT iPHOTO.

SOME PEOPLE,INSTEAD OF PUTTING THEMSELVES

OR A THING THEY LOVE,WILL PUT A SLOGAN

THAT MEANS A LOT TO THEM,AND THIS IS A POPULAR ONE.

"LIBERTY.DON'T TREAD ON TEA!"

THIS IS A VERY LITERALINTERPRETATION

OF THE TEA PARTY,

WHERE THEY BELIEVETHEIR TEA IS STILL IN JEOPARDY

FROM HIGH TAXES,

CRIPPLING TAXES.

SO THEY DID WHATANY SENSIBLE PERSON WOULD DO.

THEY DREW A SNAKETO PROTECT THEIR TEA.

AND THEN TO MAKE SURENO ONE STEALS THE SNAKE

THAT PROTECTS THEIR TEA,

THEY COPYRIGHTED IT.

SO NO ONE ELSE DRAWS A SNAKETO PROTECT THEIR TEA.

THIS IS ANOTHER ONE I LOVE.

"ATTENTION, LIBERALS,WARNING,

TEA PARTY IN PROGRESS."

I HAVE NEVER FELTSO NOT SCARED,

AS I--OF THIS FAKECONSTRUCTION SIGN

WARNING ME OF A TEA PARTY.

GO AHEAD, LITTLE GIRL.