Brian Regan - Bird Sounds

Brian Regan: Standing Up Season 1, Ep 1 06/09/2007 Views: 43,694

Brian Regan imagines what happened when the guy in charge of adding ambient sounds to golf telecasts got a phone call from an obsessive birder. (2:30)

NBC Sports,on their golf telecast--

They got caughtputting in bird noisesfor ambience.

Birds aren't even there.

And a bird lovercalled 'em on it,

because he was hearing a birdthat was not indigenous...

to where the tournamentwas being held.


Can you imagine beingthe guy who had to fieldthat phone call?

"Uh, yeah, Sports Department."

"Uh, yeah, hi.

Listen, uh, does thissound right to you?"

[ Whistling ]

"No, that don't. Um--I-I don't know whatyou're talkin' about."

"Yeah. Yeah, apparentlyyou don't.

"Yeah, I guess I'm supposedto believe the Blue-Breasted'Whipoorwillow'...

"has decided to alterits annual migratory route...

to enjoy a little golf."

[ Laughing ]"What?"

"Maybe for that reasonyou should try"--

[ Imitating Bird Call ]


"I get it. I got one.

[ High-Pitched Voice ]"Cuckoo!

Cuckoo. Cuckoo for Cocoa Puffs."

[ Gibberish ]

You have to admire that guy.You have to admire him.

You're not gonna slipa chirp past him.

"What the hell was that?

"Please tell me I did notjust hear that. Please.

Please tell me this is nothappening to me today."

I wish he would havehandled it differently.

I wish, instead of calling,he would have snuck in therelate at night,

pulled out that bird tape,you know,

and stuck in anotheranimal track.

No one would even knowtill it's goin' out live.

[ Hushed Voice ]"Um, Ernie Els is...

"looking at abouta 10-foot putt here.

"This is--[ Laughs ]

This is a downhill putt.It's gonna breaka little bit to his left."

[ Imitating Bird Screeching ]