Lizz Winstead - Chips Friend

Federman, Winstead, Richards Season 1, Ep 9 05/30/1994 Views: 2,426

Liz can't even get the chips right. (1:55)

I need help.

I am.

I'm so-- I'malways-- do you ever

feel like you're justso exhausted, always?

I really hate helping.

Is that bad?

You know when someoneinvites you to dinner,

then they ask youto bring the food?

Why are they inviting you?

They just want yourpans and the leftovers.

They don't want you.

And they always make it soundlike it's really good, too.

They call you up."Yeah, hi, Liz.

So you're coming over tonight?


Well, we have justabout everything,

although there isa couple things.

Let's see, who'sgoing to be there?

There'll be, uh, Nancy andPaul, and Tom and Jean--

and of course, you're not gonnahave a date, so that's seven.

Seven lobsters.

Can you do that?

No, no, no, we have the water.

I hate these people.

Because I like beingthe chip person.

Don't you love when youget to bring the chips?

Although you realizeat that point,

you are the lowestfood-chain person.

You're the irresponsible friendthat can't get anything right.

And you love it.

It's true. 'Causeyou'll evens crew

up the chip thing atthat point, right?

You show up at the party withsome totally lame excuse.

"I went to threestores, no chips!

Everybody was out of chips.

I could not believe it."

And I just can't move.

I just-- my couch, Ijust love my couch.

And in LA, everybodygoes outside and stuff,

and I don't get it.

Working out?

My roommate is this completelypsychotic, anal-retentive

nightmare roommate.

Do you know these anal people?

Are you these anal people?

I mean, he's the kind of guywho'll eat bran on the toilet.

Do you understandwhat I'm telling you?

He's insane.

I mean, why even eat the bran?

Why not just buy the bran,throw it in your toilet?

Alleviate the middle man.

It'd, like, be so mucheasier in your life.

And he's thisinsane guy, running

all the time with our dog.

We have a male GreatDane in our house, Marty.

Three years old.

The dog is this big.

Now I don't know aboutyou guys-- I swear to god,

there should be some kind a lawthat male Great Danes should

have to wearunderwear in public.