Ready for the Ball

Deuce Ex Machina Season 2, Ep 17 08/02/2016 Views: 378

A fairy godmother turns out to be less than helpful to a little girl. (2:44)

[glass breaks]- Shit!

- Is somebody there?

- God, sorry.That's my bad.

I will--I'll pay for that.

I have one, two, three--

$6 and an iTunes gift card.

Do you wantan iTunes gift card?

- No. Who are you?

- I'm your fairy godmother.- What?

Like in the stories?

- Uh-huh, and I came hereto get you ready for the ball.

[babbles]

Ta-da!

- Did you just turn my computerinto a pumpkin?

- [laughs]

You said "pupkin."That's not a word.

- Pumpkin is a word.

- Wait, wait.How am I saying it?

Pup, pump, pup,pumpin, punkpin?

- Pumpkin.Can you turn it back, please?

- But what are you gonna rideto the ball, sweetheart?

- Okay, A, I don't thinkI can ride that

because it is a pumpkin,and, B, I'm not going to a ball.

- Ugh.Well, then where are you going?

- To school.In four hours.

- Then we got lots of time.

You want to do some shots?- No.

- I mean, we could just drinkstraight-up cough syrup.

I mean, that's whatyou kids do, right?

- No!

- Okay, okay, okay.Look, here.

My friend Dougis supposed to call me,

but he hasn't called me yet,so I don't want to go to bed.

- I'm...sorry?

- Can you just text him for me

from your phoneand ask him where he is?

- I don't have a phone!

And if I did, I wouldn't betexting adult men with it!

- Doug is not an adult.He's only 27.

- Can you please just changemy computer back?

- You're no fun.

[babbles]

Ta-da!

[bleep].

What is wrongwith this thing?

- I think you should go.

- No, no, I'm gonna fix this

because I amyour fairy [bleep] godmother

and I'm gonna do it.

Abracadabra and--

Yes!

I turned a popkininto a pumpkin.

- Dad!

- Wait, shh.

- Dad!

- Shh, shh. Wait, wait.How old is your dad?

- Ugh. I don't know,in his 40s?

- Oh, well, that's too old.

27 is my limit.

I have a boyfriend,so I'm gonna go.

Toodle--[crashes]

- Dad!

- Wait, wait, wait, but first,

we got to make that dressreal pretty for the ball.

- Sha-slam!

- [groaning]

- Oh. Whoopsie!

[phone ringing]

[phone beeps]- Hello.

- Yo, where are you?We're still raging.

- Damn! I will be right there,Doug! Got me?

I just had to help this littlegirl get ready for the ball.

You're welcome.

[window opens]

Oh. [screams]

[laughs]

- Dad!

- What is it, pumpkin?

Pumpkin!