Exclusive - Aziz Ansari - "Willow" Related Death

Aziz Ansari: Intimate Moments for a Sensual Evening Season 1, Ep 1 01/17/2010 Views: 305,997

After admitting how often he uses his BlackBerry while driving, Aziz Ansari imagines what would happen if Googling his own name caused his untimely death. (1:58)

I LIKE LIVING IN L.A.

ONE THING I DON'T LIKE ABOUTLIVING HERE IS DRIVING.

I ALWAYS GET BORED WHEN I'MDRIVING, AND WHEN I GET BORED,

I GO ON THE INTERNET ON MYBLACKBERRY, SO I'M GONNA DIE,

AND WHENEVER THEY GO THROUGH THERECORDS, THEY'LL FIND MY PHONE

AND BE LIKE, "WHOA, THAT'S WHATHE LOOKED UP RIGHT BEFORE HE

DIED?"IT'LL BE SO SAD.

IT'LL BE LIKE, "COMEDIANAZIZ ANSARI WAS KILLED IN A CAR

ACCIDENT TODAY.

HE WAS STRUCK BY ANOTHER VEHICLEWHILE USING IMDB TO SEE IF

VAL KILMER WAS INDEED IN THEFILM WILLOW.

REPRESENTATIVES FOR MR. KILMERCONFIRM HE WAS INDEED IN THE

FILM AND HOPES THIS'LL PREVENTFUTURE TRAGEDIES OF THIS NATURE.

THIS IS THE THIRD WILLOW- RELATED DEATH

THIS YEAR."

"COMEDIAN AZIZ ANSARI WAS KILLEDIN A CAR ACCIDENT TODAY.

HE WAS STRUCK BY ANOTHER VEHICLEWHILE CHECKING SHOWTIMES FOR UP

ON FANDANGO.

HE'D JUST PURCHASED A SINGLETICKET FOR A 4:00 SHOW AT A $2

THEATER IN ORDER TO LIVE OUT THESADDEST AFTERNOON OF ALL TIME."

"COMEDY BAD BOY AZIZ ANSARI, AKACOMEDY HEARTTHROB AZIZ ANSARI,

WAS KILLED IN AN AWFULAUTOMOBILE ACCIDENT TODAY.

HE WAS STRUCK BY ANOTHER VEHICLEWHILE GOOGLING HIS OWN NAME."

I DO DO THAT, MAN.

IT'S HARD NOT TO.

EVERYONE I KNOW, THEY GOOGLETHEIR NAME, SEE WHAT PEOPLE

WRITE, AND IT'S SO FUNNY TO READIT, 'CAUSE PEOPLE ALWAYS THINK,

LIKE, "OH, MAN, THERE'S NO WAYHE'D HAVE TIME TO EVER READ

THIS."

HA, YEAH I DO.

I DON'T DO ANYTHING.

I TAKE NAPS ALL DAY.

AND I READ--THIS ONE TIME, THISGIRL, LIKE, HAD WRITTEN ABOUT,

LIKE, HOW SHE HAD A CELEBRITYCRUSH ON ME, AND IT'S FUNNY,

'CAUSE SHE NEVER THOUGHT IN AMILLION YEARS THAT I'D READ

THAT, YOU KNOW, NEVER IN AMILLION YEARS WOULD I READ THAT,

BUT I DID.

SO ONE DAY, I'M JUST GONNA EMAILHER AND BE LIKE, "HEY, IT'S ME,

AZIZ!

I HEARD YOU HAVE A CELEBRITYCRUSH ON ME.

I'M A LOT LONELIER THAN YOUTHINK I AM.

WHERE'S YOUR HOUSE?

I WILL COME THERE NOW.