Uncensored - Speed Roasting - Kristina Rose

Week of 9/10/2012 - Knoxville, Miller, Buress, Harris Season 1, Ep 5 09/11/2012 Views: 28,160

Hannibal Buress, T.J. Miller and Rachael Harris team up with Jeff to roast two guys in shades, adult film actress Kristina Rose and a man with a mysterious backpack. (3:02)

So who wants toget speed-roasted?

-These two guysraise their hands?


What do you got, a fuckingpoker game to get to?

Do you know each other?



HANNIBAL BURESS: Youdon't know each other.

-Oh, my bad.

I thought you were the twoevil twins from "Breaking Bad."

Oh, that's grate.

What are those?

Gay-Bans you're wearing.

HANNIBAL BURESS: You look likeHarry Potter's Secret Service.

-Good one, Hannibal.

-Which one's thebodyguard, and which one's

the gay billionaire?

-This is KristinaRose, movie actress.

By the way, I'm a big fan.

You're awesome.

I've seen all 312of your movies.

-Have you ever seenher movies, TJ?

-Um, I have seen"The Honeymoaners."

Yeah, I have seen that.

JEFF ROSS: What'd you think?


-Kristina, if you had todo a anal scene with one

of these three people up hereon stage, who would it be?

TJ MILLER: Choose me.

It will be the least painful.

-If I had to choose.


I want the one inthe middle again.

JEFF ROSS: Oh, again?

-In, fairness, we'veworked together before.

-You were in "The Hangover,"but it was different.

It was about your labia.

-Any parting words forChristina, you guys?

-Kristina, I want you to seemy work in "Rock of Ages."

Because I get fuckedin that movie too.

-What's your name?



How'd you get hurt?

Not working out?

I like your lack of style.

What do you do all day?


-All right, well,you're dress for it.

HANNIBAL BURESS: He likethe pimp of Walmart.

-Oh my god.

It's every other actorfrom "Training Day."

-What's your name, sir?



What's in here?

Some family membersyou snuck in?

What is this here?

-So you can put your weed.

-What what?

-So you can put your weed.

-My weed?

How much fucking weeddo you think I got?

Maybe for TJ, but--

-No way, man.

That mustache implieshe's a pedophile,

and the backpack confirms it.

-Thank you so muchfor this, man.

I really appreciate it.

Is there any weed in it?

What the fuck?

Hannibal, the guydresses worse than you.

-Hey, he look the lostmember of Cypress Hill.

-Somebody give this guy aride back to Home Depot.

Thank you to all my volunteersfor being speed-roasted.

I love you guys.